this post was submitted on 16 Dec 2023
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I guess I would like to communicate with them synchronously. Idk I'm super bad at human connection so I'm not sure how one would ask, this could be an exercise in self-improvement as much as anything. Any suggestions?

I have no idea what gender they are or any details about their personal life, and I guess that's part of the reason why they are so alluring? It's almost like I'm talking to someone who gets the same amount of fired up as me about the dumbest shit and the only other people I know who are like that are my best friend and his wife

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[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

You looking for like a phone call? A text message? Honestly the best thing to do in any relationship most of the time when you have a need is to ask for it

[–] jesse@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago

Yeah maybe a phone call or something but it is a bit strange because I don't have this person's number lol

I just made a post on some obscure forum and they messaged me and we got to chatting

[–] allthetimesivedied@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago

Reminds me of an issue I had with a real-life friend. It wound up torpedoing our relationship (and it was all my fault).

See, I really liked them, but they didn’t live in my neighborhood or anything. I wanted so bad for them to be an “organic” part of my life. It felt so fucked up that the people I saw every day, or would bump into a couple times a week even, are all fucking garbage humans; and here is the most awesome person I’ve ever met, and we’ll maybe bump into eachother once every couple of months on their way to boost shit from Buffalo Exchange. Then it made me upset seeing people who were organic characters in their life, how casual their interactions were, how they were the ones who got to watch their shit (they live in a bus parked in a shitty area), they were the ones who would like, get asked to split a motel room when it’s god fucking awful hot out, etc. I would try to come up with “excuses” to go see them. My mental health plummeted. And now I’m all alone just because the way I felt wasn't fucking normal.

[–] manuallybreathing@hexbear.net 4 points 11 months ago

you're talking about a pen pal basically, but also in my experience people jumping into your dm's in any context and you not knowing anything about them is bad/ a red flag, be careful x

[–] henfredemars@infosec.pub 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I've been in a situation like this. What kind of suggestions are you looking for? Are you satisfied with this connection? What do you want to achieve?

[–] jesse@hexbear.net 4 points 11 months ago

Honestly, that's a good question. But I do think it would be cool to talk to someone who is like me in real time. Probably not anything more than a virtual friend, though I have irl friends who have developed friendships with people they met online and the concept is so foreign to me :(

Seeing the age we live in though, it doesn't seem too strange.

[–] JohnBrownNote@hexbear.net 3 points 11 months ago

playing a game that requires communication is a good one.

if you really want to baby steps it you could try getting them to watch a live event at the same time as you and then you could chat about it in real-ish time.

[–] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 2 points 11 months ago

I think this is mostly pretty common for online dating.