I debug the worst spaghetti code you have seen. Does that count as getting my hands dirty?

No...?

Ok, never mind...

Environmental protection. I dig through the dirt to figure out where wetlands were after people fuck them up.

Machinist here. But not just any machinist. I work almost exclusively with graphite. I'm sure you can imagine what a mess that makes. We do have a powerful dust collector that runs all day, but it doesn't catch everything. We get covered in the dust every day. The company does have a locker room and showers for us though, so it's not too bad. We still leave nice and clean.

It's not really "dirty" in the same sense but I'm a massage therapist. Don't think it gets more literally hands-on as far as a job goes lol. I primarily do deep tissue work, I REALLY enjoy injury-focused work, so it can be a bit tiring but it's generally pretty satisfying.

Proctologists need not reply.

I used to be a programmer, but I got sick of the whole corporate scene. Now I build and maintain houses - and my hands are dirty a good amount of the time!

Asbestos remediation. I work on roofs, basements, boiler rooms,fireplaces, lofts, house walls etc removing asbestos in every shape and form + other materials. Using crowbars, sledgehammers, i saw through steel and crush steel with the sledgehammer etc while wearing masks, I also enter oil tanks to clean them. I have done more shitty stuff with another branch of the firm that deals with more shitty stuff + old barn lofts etc on a regular basis too 😆 all of this work involves heavy lifting and carrying heavy stuff around, I have become really strong from it. If you want to get strong and get payed at the same time, I will recommend it. It's tough as hell, and only unique people work with it.

Wash them??

Woodworker. Hands are always dirty after sharpening blades.

Caretaker for my father. Lots of poop.

Also still paying my dues to the electrical union. That was a dirty AF job. Miss it a bunch, tho.

Facility maintenance. We grease motors, change belts, tighten bolts. One of the fuel pumps on our generator has a leak, so that's a fun bit of dirty hands.

My approach to maintenance also involves a lot of cleaning, because I believe clean equipment runs better over time. So cleaning off fan blades, insides of electrical cabinets, sumps, etc. We also fix sinks and toilets.

Masterbate.

Shipwright welder. I crawl all throughout the bowels of Navy and civilian ships with my gear in tow. I build new areas, cut out old areas, and perform repairs on hulls and pipes.

Soil scientist. I spent 10 years stomping through the bush and digging pits when I got there.

Now I sit behind a desk.

Diesel mechanic, the black never washes off!!

I generally wash they with warm water and soap after I'm done or taking a break. I usually take one of those little dish soap bottles from the hotel when I travel to keep in the truck, cuts right through the grease and grime pretty well even if all you have is a jug of water on hand.

My boss just had me change two coworkers' passwords so they wouldn't be able to log back in.

I keep washing and washing, but the blood won't come off.

I don't have a dirty job anymore, but the dirtiest job I've had by far was industrial carpenter. I'd go to work with clean jeans and a clean white shirt, and every day I'd come home with jeans that were black from the knees up, and a shirt that was black from the chest down.

I had to wear white shirts because nothing else would come clean. Only white with a lot of bleach would give any appearance of being laundered after a day at work on that job.

I still have a T-shirt from that job, some-odd 20 years later, and it has Hilti C100 industrial epoxy stains all over it, just as hard as the day the shirt was stained. That's my "shit's about to get real" work around the house shirt.

I'll go first.

Self-employed general contractor / plumber

I do janitorial work. I wear gloves though, so I'm not really getting dirty? I've done auto assembly work and some bullshit dealing with produce crates being sorted for cleaning that always left my hands black and shit after my shift in the past, though.

I've only ever worked 2 jobs that were not manual labor. I did network IT shit right out of highschool for about 2 years, and I also worked as a relay operator twice. Even as an ISP installer, it was mostly bolting things into things and running cable.

elementary school custodian. i love my schedule and the hours of alone time i get to listen to books and podcasts! a living wage and paid holidays are nice too.

I trim trees and operate a wood chipper-shredder. Routinely carrying huge logs and branches hereabouts and there, greasing and fuelling machinery, and brandishing dirty chainsaws.

But I prefer to wear riggers gloves, so my hands actually stay pretty clean.

Window manufacturing Our 2-part industrial sealing silicone gets everywhere; hands, clothes, hair, whatever. Never comes out of clothes and you gotta scrub hard to get it off skin.

I unload pallets of computer gear. That's not the main part of my job, but it's something that happens from time to time.

Farmer

Flooring and Flooring Accesories

Tallship sailor/rigger

Software engineer. Sometimes I spill coffee, sometimes it's chocolate or chips crumbs.

It's honest, hard work, but someone has to do it.

Loading trailers, hands generally stay clean unless my gloves are almost worn out

Hands themselves stay clean, but through my gloves/gown, I'm regularly elbow-deep into blood, guts, and poop.

Surgical technologist. It gets pretty nasty.

Pay is kinda shit though, so I'm trying to switch over to nursing.

My primary job is that of a software engineer, but I also run a small farm business. Out in the dirt, greasing equipment, repairing equipment, etc. all make me long for the Lava soap I remember as a kid.

I work in disability support so I may use various creams while massaging, I get messy while helping people with washing and toileting, and I feed people which can get messy. I also help people with their yards, cleaning their house, washing their pets, whatever they need.

I load and run two large fiber lasers cutting sheets of metal up to 1 1/4 inch thick.

I work for an ISP in the southeast USA as a field technician and it's dirty work sometimes. Fixing rodent damage to fiber connection boxes for businesses, placing temporary cables when underground lines get cut, working in dusty equipment closets, etc.

It's not bad or hard work most days.

I work in tech now, so I’m a lazy schlub. However, I’m also a college dropout out (English major) who had a ton of actual jobs in the past. Warehouse loading delivery trucks, worked in a cabinet shop, food service, etc. i

I think college grads who go into tech should have to work a normal job for at least a year before getting their tech job and making six figures right out of college.

Otherwise you end up with these entitled shitbags who complain that their company provided duck confit at lunch doesn’t have crispy enough skin (an actual thing that actually happened when i was at a big FANG company. Fucking unbelievable)

So even though I’m a techbro shitlord, i have respect for the people who work jobs.