Joke's on all you skinny folks. I carry a month of calories on me 24/7.

I’d rob everyone who has a good answer.

Open cellar door, pick up box of emergency food. Done. It's not going to be enjoyable, living on rice, emergency bars and vitamin pills for a month, but it's preferable to starving.

Most of us still have the pandemic quarantine fresh in our mind. What if the next pandemic is something deadly, like airborne ebola? You may need several months of food. 200 lbs of beans, 300 lbs of rice, 160 lbs of sugar, 300 lbs of corn flour, etc.. All vacuum sealed in 5 lb mylar bags with oxygen and moisture scavenging packs, stored inside sealed steel garbage cans to keep out the rodents. The bags are numbered. Certain bags contain poisonous substances, and should not be eaten. So if they're taken by force, karma will be a bitch.

Don't wait. I got everything for under $500 by purchasing wholesale from overstock warehouses. Had to dip into it once a few years back when we were snowed in for two weeks, so it's not just for the zombie apocalypse. Stay away from canned goods unless you're very good at rotating inventory. Most only have a two year shelf life before the flavor will go "off". If they do spoil and you eat them, there might not be any medical services.

Speaking of medical, hit up your local feed store for some antibiotics. They're much cheaper than the human variety and don't require a prescription. Print out what each is good for and required dosage. They'll last for several years past the expiration date if you keep them in a cool place. A triage kit is another essential, and learn how to use it.

Finally, learn what edible plants grow in your area. You may be surprised at how many "weeds" can be eaten. They can help round out your diet.

Once the disaster has happened it's already too late.

I have way over a month worth of food and water saved up so I'm good. I was already unprepaired when covid hit. Now I'm a little less unprepaired but I'm still not serious enough about prepping that I would be 100% comfortable had I actually need to rely on my stockpiles.

Realistically, you should always try to keep a decent food storage in your home.

Not only does proper food storage mean you are prepared in the event of some disaster or item scarcity, such as toilet paper during covid, but it also keeps grocery costs down, as you can buy discounted items in bulk and work through them until you find them at a good price to stock up again.

I realize that storage space can be limited in a home, but even when I lived in a tiny apartment I did my best to dedicate enough space for a month or two of extra food supplies.

I already have that.

The trick, on the first day of the emergency, is water. Get as much as you fucking can.

Giant bags of rice and beans + all the water I can carry.

I'd use the mystical conjuration spells to fabricate 10 trillion snickers

Will we have access to tap water, electricity, a stove? Or do we have to eat without those things?

Well if your out after a month you'll be screwed anyway. But right now I could survive a couple of months with three others.

I already have 2 freezers full of meat, frozen veg, herbs, ingredients like galanga, pandan leaves, lemon grass, Thai basil, hot peppers and what not.

Canned beans, corn, other veg, pasta, couscous, flower for chapatis and parathas, boxes full of spices from all over the world, and I always buy 18 kilo bags of Thai rice.

Beans and rice, so nice. Cheap and fulfilling.

Yeah...but I guess I should learn urban farming. If I see someone hungry I need to cook, I can't leave anyone starving, so this stuff would be gone in days.

That's called using EBT.
Living in a fixed income.

The disaster hit us a long time ago.

I'm fucked. I live in a relatively dense area so I expect the grocery stores will get depleted rather quickly. Potable water will probably also be an issue, even though there is a stream within walking distance.

Jokes on you, I'd probably be the first to die

I already have it on hand.

Eat thy neighbor. Especially the free range organic ones, vegans beware!

I'm covered for a couple of weeks. After that, I can either leave the city, forage for food, or steal some, depending on what the state of the world is.

Enslave the other three to build a farm and then eat them and wait for the greens to grow.

We already have that much food. My folks were paranoid WAAAY before the economy turned shitty so it's easier to keep up with what is already there

If I had to do it myself with nothing to start with?

Fun fact! Did you know a layer within the bark of a tree is edible?

Plenty of neighbours to eat. Just saying...

If I have access to flour and fresh water that could go a long way. I could make a sourdough loaf with just that.

I load up on a basement's worth of soylent, taters, and edible algae, and then I'd invite my two closest friends and BF.

I already have a month's worth of food in my cupboards and freezer and at least a month in vegetables in my garden. I'm not a prepper or anything I just don't like running out of food, and I also like fresh veggies.

Kill three more people and eat for 4 months. Maybe longer if I'm not picky about what I eat.