One that used to really grind my gears was "oh, you're babysitting today?"
No, they're my kids. I'm their father.
"No, I mean, you're giving Mom a break?"
FFS.
this post was submitted on 09 Jun 2024
171 points (92.5% liked)
Ask Lemmy
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Tell the ladies that you have to pee before riding a bike so your balls are empty.
I always inform any ladies present when I need to urinate
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how we ride bikes without smashing our balls
I'm a man and I... I don't know...
For the benefits of the lurkers - this one comes up quite a bit - balls sit way higher / further forward than you think they do. All our stuff pretty much hangs off the pubic bone, and dangles down from there. We have to lean way forward to actually squish anything from underneath.
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Carefully
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Quite a few.
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“How do you sleep on your stomach with your breasts?”
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“How do you see down below your breasts when you need to look to the ground?”
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“Do the size of your breasts alter what size clothes you buy?”
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“How can you not swim? Don’t breasts float like basketballs?”
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“Does having breasts ever make you feel you’re wearing your weakness?”
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“How do you clean so much hair while taking a shower?”
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“Do things ever fly up your skirt, and what do you do?”
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“How do lesbians have physical fun time?”
“How do you see down below your breasts when you need to look to the ground?”
Do you just have enormous jugs or have you known a lot of particularly dumb men?
“Does having breasts ever make you feel you’re wearing your weakness?”
Ah ok so the second one
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“How do you see down below your breasts when you need to look to the ground?”
You use mirrors, right?
“How do lesbians have physical fun time?”
Probably playing Wii U, like everyone else.
Most of us don't need mirrors though, we simply look down. And there are many forms of lesbian bedroom activity, the most common being using fingers in lieu of the sixth limb men have.
Wait, what's the fifth
The head.
Joke on you, empty things don't count!
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- “How do lesbians have physical fun time?”
Ok, that one I don't understand.
It takes line 10s of adult research to find a whole range of possibilities.
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Welp, I guess that solved the "breasts or ass" question for this guy.
- “How can you not swim? Don’t breasts float like basketballs?”
Lol, this idiot. If breasts made people float on water. We would've used artificial wearable breasts to float instead of tubes!? Such stupidity!
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This question actually came from another dude, but similar energy: I have a deep voice, so they asked, if it's relaxing to feel those bass vibrations in my body whenever I talk.
This one is amazing. One of those ones that goes so far past dumb it becomes funny.
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Well... Is it? :p
It for sure is. Like a goddamn built-in subwoofer.
I just had never thought about it before the guy asked, because obviously, I kind of grew up with that voice.
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In high school a female classmate asked me: "Do you masturbate?", and I answered "I don't need to answer you that." Well, I was actually uncomfortable by the fact that most people my age likely did, but I actually did not because I found masturbating disgusting. I thought they would think I was too odd for not masturbating lol
in 6th grade we'd go around asking the girls "do you masticate?". most would answer indignantly "no, that's disgusting!". then we'd ask them why they swallow ther food whole, like a snake.
ok, we were assholes
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I found it super uncomfortable to answer that in high school.
Then in my 20s, I'd go, "Yeah haha I guess I do."
And now my 30s, "I jag off twice a day. Three times on a good day!"
And every time, id get the same kinda approved nod.
Either masturbation has become normalized or I just give jerk off vibes.
Are people still asking you whether you masturbate in your 30s??
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Oh yay, this has finally become askreddit...
"Lemmings, what is the sexiest sex you have ever sexed?"
Lemmy is still overwhelmingly white, male, young, and nerdy. Until it gets a more diverse userbase, it won't be askreddit.
I don't know where you're getting your info, but Lemmy trends older, around 30 to middle aged and up. And there a lot of women here as well.
Questions asking "hey gender, what does X something gender?" is so stereotypical askreddit it's eye rolling.
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I have had more than a few girls ask if they can hold my dick while I piss out of curiosity and not for sexual reasons. Most of them seemed to have thought it would have kick like a firehose. I can assure you: That only happens after I've had a large soda during a 3 hour movie in a theatre.
Most of them seemed to have thought it would have kick like a firehose.
You let them?
I'll let literally anyone touch my dick if they ask. 🤷🏻♂️
this may be the most based thing I've heard anyone on Lemmy say
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I, as a male, have had multiple women ask me how we ride bikes without smashing our balls.
Been married for years when my wife asked me that... "How do you sit down?"
O_o
How many times have you seen me naked now?
Many women seem to assume that penis and balls are attached actually between the legs, just like where their vaginas are. They are surprised, if they're told, the whole assembly is actually more "at the front".
The reverse is also true, BTW. A lot of boys struggle finding the vagina because from their perspective it's waaay too low.
We barely understand our own bodies, it's not surprising that we have problems with other sexes bodies.
Yep, one of my first times messing around I got my hands down a girl's pants and was very confused for the first few inches, but got there eventually.
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How DO we ride bikes without smashing our balls?
The fear of being smashed makes them retract into their safety zone
What do you mean ? Left ball on left pedal, right ball on right pedal
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Years ago there was a profile on PoF that would hit me up every couple of months asking if they could castrate me. (I'm a trans woman)
It was weird, they weren't pushy or aggressive, more just, "Hey, you don't want them, right? Seems like a win win." Sometimes I'd play along and ask questions and stuff, but they wouldn't say much, and never actually made any effort to meet up.
I haven't thought about them in years, hahaha, but seeing your question brought it all back.
Y
I
K
E
S
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As a cis dude who's asexual, I've gotten weird questions from straight dude bros... one asked me if I "had to be super careful" to not get myself pregnant. Honest question coming from a person our country's education system has failed.
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I've had people wonder ask how I cross my legs (not foot-on-knee but actually crossed over) without my balls getting in the way or damaged
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