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Why am I at Pompeii if I'm Greek
Southern Italy had a Greek majority until the middle ages.
Teaching a rich kid philosophy
greeks set up colonies along the entirety of the mediterranean sea from the west shore to the east and from the north to the south. They were settler-colonising in this way from around the 400s or 500s BC until they got owned by the romans
goldern Greeks takin all the Roman jerbs
Wait, they are worshiping the guy that made bread and wine? Then went into a death an rebirth cycle? Are you sure they weren't confused and talking about Dionysis?
Egyptian guy overhears the conversation and breaks in arguing about Osiris
Chances are you're a follower of one of the myriad other wacky mystery cults floating around at the time anyway
Oh, your messiah died? Mine is still alive in the next village over
Oh he just died? You're telling me now for the first time
I heard they're gonna be minting a new Messiah in Alexandria next week
Jesus is a revisionist of John the Baptistism.
Why Greek specifically and not Roman?
Also Caesar and Cicero and some of the fall of the Republic all time greats were all crowded around this time period too. It was like MCU, but less lame
It was like MCU, but less lame
No matter how cringe capeshit is it will never be as cringe as the Romans.
IIRC people in that part of the Roman empire commonly spoke Greek because of Alexander the Great's conquest of the area centuries earlier. So you'd be more likely to run into someone bilingual in Aramaic and Greek than you would Aramaic and Latin
I fucked up. It was late and my wires got crossed.
I'd probably be most incredulous about the Virgin Birth part. "Wait your God didn't turn into a goose or something so he could bang Mary on the sly? You sure about that?"
Highly recommend Engels "On the History of Early Christianity" if you haven't read it.
https://www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1894/early-christianity/
In fairness Jews were very common in the east empire and gentile "god fearers" weren't uncommon either. They'd just be a particularly annoying gentile essene offshoot.
I've always wondered why people were so ready to convert. Like, if I was some ancient Roman and some guy came up to me offering a new god that's even better than the old ones and much easier to worship, I wouldn't just immediately fall for it. It just seems like a scam.
It did take a while, and I'm sure people called it a cult of Jesus or something back then too (Idk if there's evidence for that but there were many cults of Gods/demigods etc. in antiquity)
Idk, what was holding you to the other guy?
Me not getting torn apart by lions in the Arena
Imagine this dude with a Centurion hat.
Dear Nazerenes if your god is so almighty why doesnt he stop me from nailing you to this cross here
it seemed positive if you were a woman or enslaved.
Periodic reminder that the Roman Empire sucked, for everyone who wasn't a patrician.
Around that time the Gospels were all like zines, really popular in the growing christo-punk scene back then
this post was submitted on 01 Sep 2024
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