winning 270 electoral college votes
this post was submitted on 12 Nov 2024
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I'd sweep if they let me run
i'd :vote: for you.
I'd vote for me too, that's 2 votes already. I'm grassroots organizing!
gonna put "won as many elections as hillary" on my resume
Basketball. Which might not sound like a big deal, but when you're tall like me, everyone wants you for the team. I can dribble, and I can pass (hot damn, can I pass) but I can't shoot worth a damn and the most charitable thing anyone ever said about my defensive skills is that they're "technically not illegal."
Worse too is that it's not like I'm bad at sports. They probably saw me making a decent go at baseball or soccer and thought "Even if he's bad, we can teach him." They could not.
Sorry, fellow jocks. Basketball just ain't for me.
Same issues when I played as a kid. I could get the ball to someone who could shoot, but I could not hit the fucking basket to save my life.
For me it was hockey. I tried it one year in elementary school, and couldn't figure out any of the things my teammates were doing, like crossovers and lifting the puck. I didn't go back for a second year.
But I believe that hockey is a dying sport. Equipment and ice time fees at arenas are way too expensive for working families. And climate change no longer allows for outdoor rinks where kids can learn basic skills for free. There's a good reason that basketball and soccer are picking up massively in popularity in Canada, they're both sports that kids can play casually almost year-round with minimal and relatively cheap equipment.
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Have you tried volleyball? Its extremely fun and being tall helps a lot.
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Skateboarding. I tried learning how to Ollie for like an entire summer in highschool. I don't think I got the board off the ground once 
it's so hard!
try surfing, it's like skating but without the concrete. much better.
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Ollies are hard as hell. I was pretty good at skating when I was younger and did it more and I couldn't really Ollie 2 months in either, I learned some freestyle tricks on the side as well as bonelesses and some other non Ollie based things and just did some cruising around, I ollied later but has better board control and more tricks than my friends at the same time cause I wasn't just grinding out ollied until I got mad. I wouldn't get too down about it in general, skateboarding is really really really difficult, easily the hardest thing I've ever been decent at.
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Punctuality. Putting things away after using them. Remembering where I put my phone after putting it down in front of me one second ago. Calling you on your birthday. Opening my Mail and responding to it.
Took me 25 years to recognize I had ADHD. 
On a lighter note: Chess. Hate that fucking game. Makes me feel stupid everytime I look at a board. Everything is fine and suddenly your queen is hanging and your opponent gives you a smug look, as in "did you really miss that?".
Chess is one for me but in that I literally don't know how to play it, as in don't really know what pieces do what or even which is which. They are as follows, king, queen, horse, castle, other guy, pawn.
The first time I tried playing chess it was online and I fucked up and had it so I could only move one piece to one space but since I didn't know the rules I thought it just wasn't letting me move and was desperately apologizing to the other player via the chat for not understanding how to play
They beat me, btw
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Math 
You can't just take entirely different numbers and then put them together! That's unnatural and fails to rekon before God like Frankenstein did.
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Reading and writing poetry. Nothing makes me question my humanity more than seeing people be genuinely moved by poetry.
Happy for people that appreciate it, but it makes me feel like I’m an unfeeling brute more than anything else. This is a picture of me trying to understand poetry.
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My use of simile sucks like the morning sun.
Learning languages.
It just never comes together for me.
Making money
i'm so bad at this.
I cannot make my handwriting nice for the life of me. Legible will have to do
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I am extremely bad at games that require precise combos and punish button mashing. Fighting games and those Platinum Games type stylistic hack and slash especially.
Ooh, same.
The more tense it gets the more I need to do the inputs right and the less able to do them right I get.
I'm also bad at bullet hell, so despite nier automata's story and aesthetic both seeming very appealing to me, I completely bounced off it.
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Golf. I've played scrambles (you play as a team of like 3 and just use the best ball for the next hit) with friends and I usually tell them I'll just putt. Otherwise 9/10 balls will end up in the rough or a hazard.
Golf is evil anyway. Being bad at it counts as environmental activism
i'm pretty bad at motivation to change my current financial situation. You know, the whole hustle culture and everything? Get more money, better your position, etc, that kind of shit.
Like I am completely content in whatever kind of shit is thrown at me and don't feel any need to "better" it, as long I have a comfortable bed and food. I really am just a beast that wears pants.
The only thing that has made me "progress" through life is partners, and wanting better for them. So I've made career changes for their benefit but if it was just me I could really be the embodiment of that meme of a picture of a lone chair and tv/gaming console inside an empty ass apartment that says "dudes will live like this and see nothing wrong"
dudes rock
Arts and crafts. Like, if I have to glue something it will definitely be messy. I can't sow for shit. Can't cut things in a straight line, ever.
If the need to do this sort of thing arises, I hand it off to someone else.
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Actively using a map, protractor, and compass to navigate myself around on foot in non-urban environments. Having a general gyst of being able to navigate when there's big fucking landmarks nearby to triangulation off of is one thing, but drop me in a forest in the middle of nowhere and the best I got is navigating by figuring out the direction the sun and moon are going.
posting
growing mushrooms. they always fucking die
i'm a pet bad gardener too.
but I got a baby mint plant a month ago and it's getting bigger and bushy! I’m stoked, but its so hard to remember to water it every day. especially cuz sometimes I work like 16 hour days.
Videogames. As someone trying to get into it competitively, i still struggle to achieve any sort of consistency in results. It's been 2 years and i still can't beat most of my friends, much less the rest of the scene.
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Imagining 3d spaces or objects in my head. Makes me suck at directions as well as designing buildings in Minecraft.
Several people have told me I have "an interesting speaking pattern". lol
Sports (I have bad eye-leg/hand coordination so I was always bad at ball games)
FPS games (probably the same reason)
Posting (I am just not particularly funny, and I never remember to post the occasional insight I have)
i'm so bad at drawing, yet I was a graffiti writer for like 10 years.
I am really good at writing 1 word. tyvm.
I suck at playing video games. which is why I don't do it.
I suck at many sports.
I suck at being outgoing and social.
I suck at being a good person sometimes.
FPS games are a big one for me too. Just absolutely dogshit, it's embarassing.
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I was going to say bowling too. We could have the lowest scoring game of all time!
Being quiet and remembering to be quiet when it's time to be quiet. I loud.
Roller skating and ice skating.
Every time I've tired I just fall on my ass. My ex loved both and kept trying to teach me but I kept eating it.
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Composing music
Fighting games
Thing I'm bad at: composing games
Thing I'm great at: fighting music
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