When I wipe my butt it starts to fucking bleed, it's horrible. Like, I don't want to get into details, but after a few wipes it starts hurting and the paper wipes get bloody. Imagine wiping your ass with sandpaper, it's basically that, but somehow replicated with regular toilet paper.

I have to go shower every single time I poo to actually clean my butt.

As of writing this, it's 1 A.M and I just pooed, couldn't wipe as usual, but as I mentioned, it's 1 A.M. If I were to attempt to clean myself in the shower, i'd wake everyone up. So, i can't rinse butt,.

I am writing this with a half wiped butt. Buy me a bidet, please

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[–] Clippy@hexbear.net 23 points 1 week ago (2 children)

unfortunately.

[–] nohaybanda@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago

is-this the dialectic?

[–] Spike@hexbear.net 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This sounds less bidet more go see a doctor, but I assume that is not possible because of healthcare costs

[–] Clippy@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago

i mean i kind of assumed that the op was exaggerating, but if he is unironic - he should probably see if he has butt cancer ig