chapotraphouse

It's complicated. People on the east coast move fast and speak their minds. If they're mad at you they'll let you know. But at the same time, they can be very helpful and kind, they're just going to be assholes about it. I used to joke that you've finally adjusted to living in Philly when you can tell the difference between "I am going to stab you and then piss on your grave" fuck you and "hey do you want to come over for dinner and meet my mom" fuck you. It's a very aggressive, frank culture, but not necessarily a cruel one.

Meanwhile, down south, there's a whole system of intense social violence built around cruel courtesy. Folks will use phrases like "bless your heart" the way we use "Deeply unserious". Then go over to Texas and you tend to get genuinely, weirdly friendly people. Up in the Midwest folks are superficially polite but really extremely cold and distant. In California everyone's friendly but the stereotype is that it's a superficial friendliness that doesn't reach the eyes. This is, of course, all dependent on race, class, gender, and a dozen other factors.

Folks say there's no culture in the US, but there really is. Deep, complicated cultures with their own norms, problems, joys, dialects. And then you get in to PoC and other minority groups. Like, White Minnesotans have a totally different culture than Hmong Minnesotans, African American Minnesotans, or Somali Minnesotans. There's overlap, but also a huge amount of difference.