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Lmao Cheesecake Factory
Cheesecake factory cakes are so bad. They don't even taste like real cheesecake, they just taste like watery corn syrup. This is a common thing with American food it seems. Watered down but also somehow too sweet.
Watered down but also somehow too sweet.
Besides corn syrup - they likely use some artificial sweeteners which are insanely sweeter than sugar.
Ninja edit
Facts About Sugar and Sugar Substitutes | Johns Hopkins Medicine
Most artificial sweeteners (also called nonnutritive sweeteners) are created from chemicals in a lab. A few are made from natural substances like herbs. They can be 200 to 700 times sweeter than table sugar.
Sucralose Damages DNA, Linked to Leaky Gut: Study
June 1, 2023 – A new study reveals health concerns about the sugar substitute sucralose so alarming that researchers said people should stop eating it and the government should regulate it more.
Sucralose is sold under the brand name Splenda and is also used as an ingredient in packaged foods and beverages. The researchers found that sucralose causes DNA to break apart, putting people at risk for disease. They also linked sucralose to leaky gut syndrome, which means the lining of the intestines are worn down and become permeable. Symptoms are a burning sensation, painful digestion, diarrhea, gas, and bloating.
When a substance damages DNA, it is called genotoxic. Researchers have found that eating sucralose results in the body producing a substance called sucralose-6-acetate, which the new study now shows is genotoxic. The researchers also found sucralose-6-acetate in trace amounts in off-the-shelf products that are so high, they would exceed the safety levels currently allowed in Europe.
I hate knowing what all of these things are. My mom used splenda for years. Fuck.
My wife informed me that Olive Garden was not actually a fancy restaurant... this was a shock to me...
I have no idea how any of these rank. I assume cheesecake factory sells cheesecake. Does applebees sell apples with bees (or maybe honey)? Who knows, I'll never find out on a date I assume. We have a cheesecake shop here but that's about it.
lol even cheesecake factory's exotic around here. their gimmick is basically that they have EVERYTHING on the menu - like a ridiculously long menu of nearly any food you could think of, all done servicably but none of it really standing out. cheesecake is merely one of the bajillion things they have. it's popular because if you bring a group there everyone will find something on that menu they're willing to eat, whereas if you go to red lobster or something and someone doesnt' like seafood then lol they can eat chicken strips i guess.
unironically an important step in my radicalization was receiving a meme to this effect like a decade ago and it clicking. "oh, rich people literally do not understand most people don't eat at upscale places. this person actually thinks they're culturally superior to me because i do not eat at 'actually fancy' restaurants. they think the reason I have never eaten at a three star restaurant is because I'm close minded, not that i can't afford to blow that much of my money on a single meal or spend an hour just driving each way. the entire joke is that they're not racist because they have an open mind and eat at a lot of sit down restaurants and poor people are racist because they've only ever eaten at olive garden a few times and just refuse to try anything different."
i've learned enough since to understand that not all of the US is as utterly fucked as this and in some places there's affordable restaurants that are much higher quality and that the restaurant industry as a whole is an abusive nightmare, but that really did get me thinking about the liberal contempt of the masses.
Is the USA really this level of suburban hell? I have never been on a date, taken a partner on a date, even thought of having a date in a chain restaurant. Aren't you guys supposed to be the small business republic?
I see this image and I wonder where the fuck else people are going to eat. Tbh this reads as a very urban take, if you're living in an area that basically exists to service people driving on the interstate it is just all chains. Any "family" restaurants are serving food from the same bulk supplier so they're identical to one another as well on top of tasting bad and being overpriced. People say chains are bad but like theyr'e at least consistent, paying $20 for really bad pizza that's worse than the $10 pizza you can get from Pizza Hut of all places is the extent of commercial food culture in much of so-called flyover country.
There isn't really such a thing as a public space out here. Any other kind of date is simply going to be at a bar or at someone's house. You simply do not socialize like how people socialize on TV out here, you either have to be visiting your friends' houses regularly or you're going to simply go direclty home and watch TV. There's simply not enough rich people to support anything more upscale.
in my country - or at least were i live - chain restaurants are something that mainly exist in cities
I cannot stress enough that I am not exaggerating, this is what a majority of this hell country looks like
Only major cities and tourist towns really have local restaurants worth thinking about. The rest of it is the same chains.
If you’re lucky you get to pay an absurd amount of money to live somewhere that looks like this instead
And then it’s still mostly chains they’re just much more expensive ones.
in the US midwest, they're more suburban or rural, or at least if you live near major highways. it's very easy for golden handcuffs to choke out any local businesses in these places that simply lack the population density to support anything more niche. they literally pay employees more than local businesses, abuse their workers less because they have an actual HR department that provides some level of protection against the most obvious abuses of individual managers (ie mangers get fired for groping people, where small business tyrants just get away with it), charge less than anything local, and then once anything speciifc to that location has closed down they let the entire community rot.
the norm is much more around people visiting each other's houses, you don't really go anywhere other than a chain to hang out. there's a nice playground but that's generally not for adults on dates, that's for people with kids. there's not completely nothing but it's nothing that would wow someone that is turning up their nose at olive garden of all things. you simply are not going to be eating at a michelin star restaurant without a very long ass drive.
hell at weddings i don't think i remember ever actually being professionally catered. it's always either a pitch in or certain relatives assigned the task of making all the food. everyone just cooks at home. i've eaten much more baking sheet/pan pizza than i've eaten pizza at an actual pizza place, there's like two pizza places that aren't chains around here and i hate both of them.
the norm is much more around people visiting each other's houses
for first dates? that sounds kinda scary. here the norm is either coffee shop/cafe, grabbing a drink at a bar, or just going on a walk/hike
blind dates aren't super common, most people aren't really meeting on apps or anything ('cause again, not enough population density to make those things work), so a "first date" is still often with someone you've met a few times at least. but yeah in that sort of situation you're going to fuckin' olive garden lol.
My lover has told me that if I take her to Olive Garden, she'll know it's over between us.
spots = restaurants apparently.
the main problem is for large swaths of america, those are the nicest restaurants you can go to. chipotle is the worst in this list though, at least go somewhere there is a server.
at least go somewhere there is a server.
it's only romantic if there are personal servants to exploit
Obviously they didn't survey the women in the southeast. Alabama loves first dates at Olive Garden.
Cuz when you're here, you're family.
I always thought Olive Garden was the breakup restaurant.
I'm too lazy to find the original, but this is ripped from a tweet where some guy just asked his female friends and listed 30 something answers.
Thoughts
The fact that these exist and are significant enough to make such a list elicits one thought: death to amerika
Can't go wrong with Chuck E Cheese
found the
Teenagers planning prom night absolutely shaking rn.
Dorsia is the obvious choice
lol dating
protect your vital essences, lads
People are buying whole ass meals for a first date? Seems like a lot of commitment.
mcdonalds stay winning smh
Take me to the local mom'n'pops hole in the wall that never grew out of the 50's and who's every "secret ingredient" is a wad of lard on a skillet. Take me to a ramen hut where the chef lives in the apartment above. Take me to that tiny coffee shop and nerdy tabletop joint that the married couple owns to save on rent and has wildly clashing aesthetic choices. Take me to the BBQ pit where beer guts and 70's afros are the dress code and there are 6 seats and a booth.
First dates are meant to be easy, casual, and an honestly blatant first-sight judgement calls of the tastes of the other person. Local, less-known joints are the perfect way to show depth of character and that you can show potential partners novel and interesting experiences. It doesn't have to be food either. Arcades, natural spaces, and quiet, secluded spots that let you both be at ease as you explore future prospects with one another.
dating spots being the same few chain restaurants (that heat frozen food) off of every interstate exit ever
I agree. A good first date should be something that lasts about an hour, is a light activity in a public space (like a good walk or a cup of coffee and some boardgames), which should open up the possibility for making the date last longer, if the connection is there, or which gives a polite "out" if it isn't.
Taking someone to a restaurant on a first date is a bad idea. It's gonna cost a lot of money, which creates a weird sort of vibe, and it keeps you captive for way too long, with no clear "end" to the date. It's just barely above going to the movies, because at least you can talk. Meeting over dinner is pretty intimate, that's a 2nd date thing (or something you escalate the 1st date into, if it goes well).
This of course comes from someone who lives in a walkable city in a country with a culture of splitting the bill. It'll probably vary for you yanks. But seriously I think a good first date is something light, casual, safe and short. You're trying to find out if you wanna get to know each other better, and you might find out you don't. If that's the case then it sucks being in a situation where you can't leave, and where there is no polite way of declining at the end.
A good (and cheap) alternative is a picnic.
I'm making bombay briyani and you are all invited
This is silly. If you eat at those places regularly because you enjoy them then take your date there. If you like bad-okay food then don't hide it.
they only surveyed crackers
Ms. Stapler was tickling me one time and I told her if she didn't cut it out we were going to Applebee's for dinner.
Cursed
My partner and I had our first date at a dive bar. Then went to a taphouse and the beach
The worst date I went on before meeting her was at a cheesecake adjacent place (Yard House)
Really just don't take anyone to these places. Ever.
I'll indulge in Chipotle maybe, but alone in quiet shame.