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[-] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 144 points 2 months ago

In highschool I worked at a pharmacy. 30-something man looks lost so I ask him if I can help him find something. He says diapers and I assume he's a father so I stupidly say "the adult ones are right down there but you don't need those ha ha, the baby diapers are down aisle 1"

You can guess the rest of the story...

[-] RestrictedAccount@lemmy.world 70 points 2 months ago

There is a funny columnist named Dave Barry who has a list of the things I took him 50 years to learn.

One is that, unless you see the baby crowning, never mention that a woman may be pregnant.

I think this falls into a similar category.

[-] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 31 points 2 months ago

I 100% agree so it makes this story even better.

A friend and his wife were at a social event and his wife was very early in pregnancy, they had only told their parents at this point. A 70-something year old man in a suit walks up to them out of the blue and says congratulations. They are taken aback because they didn't even consider him referring to the pregnancy. He goes on to say he is a retired obstetrician and because of years of experience can just tell.

Ballsy move by the doc but he sure did know his stuff.

[-] criss_cross@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

I love me some Dave Barry. Don't follow the Herald but his books were great.

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[-] kiwifoxtrot@lemmy.world 29 points 2 months ago

Could have simply been looking after an elderly parent.

[-] jaybone@lemmy.world 33 points 2 months ago

That or recovering from a surgery.

There’s plenty of reasons someone might need adult diapers without being old. Not that it’s any less embarrassing for some people either way.

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[-] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

He was very embarrassed but it very well could have not been for him personally. Either way it was a dumbass thing to say!

[-] cordlesslamp@lemmy.today 13 points 2 months ago

Actually I can't figure it out. Would you please finish your story?

[-] we_avoid_temptation@lemmy.zip 22 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

The customer needed the adult diapers.

Not the OP, but I've been that person before. I'll leave it up to your imagination what position I was in.

I'll admit I am somewhat curious how it all played out though.

[-] peopleproblems@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago
[-] we_avoid_temptation@lemmy.zip 6 points 2 months ago

You're not wrong

[-] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

He was very embarrassed and went for the adult diapers. My 17 year old gangly, awkward self didn't help the situation at all either.

[-] Volkditty@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

I imagine you, still not getting it, yelling "Sir, sir! I said those were the adult diapers! Sir!"

[-] tattletaletimes@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago

Thank god I wasn't that dumb, I would have died from embarrassment

[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 9 points 2 months ago

Once I had food poisoning so bad that my spouse got adult diapers for me, so I could try to sleep. In sickness and in health!

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[-] MadBob@feddit.nl 88 points 2 months ago

The way out is easy: "oh god, sorry to hear it, I'd rather have the person too". I don't think I'm a social genius.

[-] xantoxis@lemmy.world 43 points 2 months ago

I also choose this lady's dead husband.

[-] cybersandwich@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

Yea for real. They know you didn't know that. Just be empathetic.

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[-] bjoern_tantau@swg-empire.de 74 points 2 months ago

And then a very charismatic person behind her asks "How much do you want the person", while twirling their mustache.

[-] Technus@lemmy.zip 65 points 2 months ago

Are there not standard questions the teller is supposed to ask when they're handed a check this large?

[-] Aggravationstation@feddit.uk 110 points 2 months ago
  • How bloody is this money?
  • Are you single?
[-] Technus@lemmy.zip 48 points 2 months ago
  • Need help burying the body?
[-] jaybone@lemmy.world 20 points 2 months ago

In OP’s case, that would be even worse.

[-] cordlesslamp@lemmy.today 6 points 2 months ago

Where do you live?

(assuming the bank teller don't have access to that information already)

[-] Technus@lemmy.zip 16 points 2 months ago

My dumb ass thought you were actually asking me for a second

[-] Nelots@lemm.ee 7 points 2 months ago

No really, where do you live?

[-] jaybone@lemmy.world 6 points 2 months ago

How you doin?

[-] nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz 54 points 2 months ago

Sometimes you trip into other people's bad days. OP didn't say anything wrong.

[-] explodicle@sh.itjust.works 24 points 2 months ago

IIRC bank tellers are supposed to talk about stuff like this to help catch fraud and extortion. If she sees a huge sum of money, it's her job to strike up conversation about it.

[-] cm0002@lemmy.world 9 points 2 months ago

WHY DID YOU REDEEM ITTTT!!! MAAAAM!

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[-] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago

"Oh wow, the crime must be going really well, eh?"

[-] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 46 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Me, had I been the teller...

[-] bane_killgrind@slrpnk.net 16 points 2 months ago

Do it a different way or there won't be a cheque dude

[-] lobut@lemmy.ca 43 points 2 months ago

Better than saying, "I'd kill for one of these."

[-] driving_crooner 4 points 2 months ago

"I'll kill again for one of these"

[-] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 43 points 2 months ago

"For what it's worth, they probably weren't all that great."

Problem fixed.

[-] GraniteM@lemmy.world 41 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

A while back I broke up after a long term committed relationship, and part of the process involved splitting our finances. I went to the bank to close our account, and it being around November, the teller innocently asked, "Do you have any plans for the holidays?"

I deadpan replied, "Well, I'm closing out a joint checking account, so what do you think?"

The teller: O___O "I am so sorry!"

Fortunately I was able to laugh about it and tell them it was okay.

Joke's on them, though, because I wound up getting blackout drunk on Johnny Walker Black with a real beard mall Santa that Christmas and saying things about my ex that I should not have said.

[-] ryo 5 points 2 months ago

Black Label is the best thing to blackout from.

[-] PrincessLeiasCat@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

I want to know more about your time with Santa. That night sounds epic tbh

[-] GraniteM@lemmy.world 5 points 2 months ago

Summed up very briefly:

[-] ameancow@lemmy.world 21 points 2 months ago

This is why when you work in customer-facing positions in any capacity, you NEVER comment on their purchases, their choices, their business, what they are buying, if you've seen them before, etc. Just mouth-shut, smile and get them through.

[-] todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee 18 points 2 months ago

"Well, I'll take the money if it's not important to you..."

[-] jacktherippah@lemmy.world 17 points 2 months ago

I also choose your dead person.

[-] can@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago
[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 4 points 2 months ago

"I'm a person. Wanna trade?"

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this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2024
1009 points (98.7% liked)

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