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help ICE stay off their tail

[-] blight@hexbear.net 41 points 4 days ago
[-] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 20 points 4 days ago
[-] blight@hexbear.net 16 points 4 days ago

sure it might kill you, but it might also give you seemingly superpowers

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[-] TonoManza@lemmygrad.ml 38 points 4 days ago

Register them to VOTE

[-] rhubarb@hexbear.net 29 points 4 days ago

Clothesline -> bounce off the ropes -> elbow drop

[-] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 20 points 4 days ago

What if they're nice and just want to look at flowers?

[-] culpritus@hexbear.net 24 points 4 days ago

posad solidarity posadas

Please help the socialists overthrow capitalism, the ruling class is going to attack you anyway.

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 21 points 4 days ago

There's a Wojak comic I saw, around the time covid really became a pandemic, where a flying saucer lands and a posad steps out, and the doomer seeing the alien just says "Yeah."

posad "I thought you'd be more shocked or something."

doomer "I got a lot going on right now."

There's also a joke in Poland where US astronauts made a first landing on Mars and before they manage to come out aliens weld the hatch from outside because Poles were there first and taught them some practical industrial worker jokes.

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[-] TerminalEncounter@hexbear.net 26 points 4 days ago

Are they landing specifically in front of me? Or like, they landed somewhere?

Cause, honestly, I'd probably have to go to work still lol

[-] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 24 points 4 days ago

They land in front of you and sorry they zapped your boss

[-] TerminalEncounter@hexbear.net 16 points 4 days ago

"Hey aliens, welcome to earth, bathroom is the last door on the left, last one out hit the lights, I appreciate you zapping my shitty manager but I still kind of have to go to work, people depend on me. Uh, there's wine in the cupboard if you want any."

[-] CommunistBear@hexbear.net 8 points 4 days ago

they zapped your boss

I would greet them as liberators

[-] EllenKelly@hexbear.net 24 points 4 days ago

The same thing we do every night, you pinko, try to take over the world!

I sometimes fall asleep imagining scifi stories about aliens coming to earth and ending imperialism, i think I watched too much startrek

[-] woodenghost@hexbear.net 15 points 4 days ago

Wow, I do the exact same thing sometimes! Also watched allot of Star Trek. It's not ideal for me, because it's not a calm topic, but if I can't help thinking about these things anyway, might as well. How does it work for you? Any tips, what (else) to think about when falling asleep?

[-] EllenKelly@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago

Most of the time I fall asleep reading, but i find it 'fun' to distract myself with thinking up the bones of an elaborate story about the future being brighter

I dont generally sleep well though, and I hate dreaming, sorry

[-] AntiOutsideAktion@hexbear.net 20 points 4 days ago

Go to work. Hear about it when I check in with this website at 11pm via some 3rd degree meme that doesn't even specifically say what happened. Go to bed at a reasonable hour.

[-] witheyeandclaw@hexbear.net 22 points 4 days ago

I'd call them visitors not aliens. I feel like they'd appreciate it.

[-] space_comrade@hexbear.net 20 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

I'd start uncontrollably screeching at them "PLEASE HELP LAZER ZAP ALL BILLIONAIRES AND DESTROY THE US MILITARY PLEASE DO SOMETHING"

[-] Stoneykins@hexbear.net 22 points 4 days ago

probably annoy them by asking too many questions without even being able to understand the answers so I ask even more questions

kinda like a little kid saying "why?" for hours

[-] 2Password2Remember@hexbear.net 18 points 4 days ago

id prolly try to fuck one. plenty of people are gonna do it but only one person is going into the history books as the first

Death to America

[-] Owl@hexbear.net 17 points 4 days ago

I'd be like, " 'sup"

[-] DavidGarcia@feddit.nl 16 points 4 days ago
[-] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 17 points 4 days ago

Show them some yoyo tricks i half remember, they may not have yoyos from their part(s??) of the cosmos

[-] kristina@hexbear.net 14 points 4 days ago

show them a picture of my butthole and explain this is a traditional earth greeting they should replicate to get on our good sides

Do you already have one on hand for that scenario?

[-] sweatersocialist@hexbear.net 9 points 4 days ago

hey i'm an alien let me see

[-] kristina@hexbear.net 5 points 4 days ago

sure here you go

nudes

PIGPOOPBALLS

[-] novibe@lemmy.ml 6 points 4 days ago

A picture? I mean it’s right there!

[-] Josephine_Spiro@hexbear.net 13 points 4 days ago

Hope they liberate us from capitalism, and also I'd ask if they can give me a dog tail and ears because I'd like those

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 12 points 4 days ago

I'd be over the moon (pun intended) because a whole lot of space libertarian bullshit theories about how the entire universe is just a bunch of resource nodes to strip-mine to make more bazinga trash would be BTFO and the space libertarians would, instantly, realize there's someone that doesn't answer to them.

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[-] context@hexbear.net 12 points 4 days ago

hitch a ride out of here

[-] Assian_Candor@hexbear.net 12 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

sit-back-and-enjoy

I was gonna say 3 body problem that shit and get them to try to take over but let's be real the us would nuke them at which point the situation sort of resolves itself

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I would start by attempting to ask them a lot of questions. What I would do next would depend on the answers to those questions.

Annihilate whites

[-] gramxi@hexbear.net 9 points 4 days ago
[-] sweatersocialist@hexbear.net 15 points 4 days ago

hawk me tuah your leader

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[-] bunnygirl@hexbear.net 9 points 4 days ago

Report to the ship as soon as possible

[-] Frank@hexbear.net 8 points 4 days ago

Well, I'm trying to make a little tool rack today.

idk, with everything else going on, it just kind of feels like it'd be out of the scope of my concerns. I'd probably glue myself to the News Mega.

[-] vovchik_ilich@hexbear.net 6 points 4 days ago

Given how they're super intelligent, I'd ask them when they sent Lenin over to earth disguised as one of us

[-] afters@hexbear.net 7 points 4 days ago

Invite them over for dinner

The London system with white or the Sicilian with black

[-] sweatersocialist@hexbear.net 6 points 4 days ago

challenge them to a debate to prove i am the most powerful redditor

[-] D61@hexbear.net 5 points 4 days ago

Put on an extra dog collar and hope they treat me well?

[-] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 4 points 3 days ago

Probably still go to work and check my phone a lot. If the arrival of aliens means I suddenly don't have to pay rent, something else

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this post was submitted on 03 Nov 2024
70 points (100.0% liked)

askchapo

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