i gotta hop on dear brother, i was already planning on it but this video convinced me i'll like it WAY more than rose of versailles (which i already liked!)
also turn a gundam fucking rules and i'm glad they agree that guin is 100% a chaser
i gotta hop on dear brother, i was already planning on it but this video convinced me i'll like it WAY more than rose of versailles (which i already liked!)
also turn a gundam fucking rules and i'm glad they agree that guin is 100% a chaser
whoops, i had it on there the first couple times i tried posting. must have left it out on accident the try that actually worked
watch uc gundam
or read the explanation i wrote in my other post
in zeta gundam char and amuro are drinking together and amuro makes a joke about how char needs to become a human sacrifice like his father to achieve their goals of freeing humanity from earth's gravity (which is, to oversimplify, a metaphor for bringing about mass class consciousness and breaking the imperialist grip the earth has on its colonies in space)
in the bottom three panels, char looks at his drink, then looks determined, then the last panel is char in the film char's counterattack, where he has decided to fully become a human sacrifice to achieve this, and amuro is now fighting against him. implicitly char is reminiscing about the previous conversation as he drinks alone this time
i have to ask again, you think the problem people have with it is that it says sexual violence is bad? you think that's why people dislike it?
the sexual violence in sao is also supposed to be bad! they kill the guy who does it! that doesn't excuse the framing, it's still a bad show that handles its sexual assault poorly, but framing sexual violence for titillation is so often combined with setting up a villain and showing just how evil he is. it shows up all the fuckign time, including in series i otherwise love. goblin slayer is worse than most in that it spends more time on it and it's way more explicit than it usually is, and it's the first impression the show gives you
wait you think people dislike goblin slayer BECAUSE it shows sexual violence as bad? you think the people who dislike goblin slayer are sitting around going "oh if only there were more wacky sexual harassment i might like this show"?
the problem with goblin slayer is that it shows the sexual violence in a way where it clearly expects the audience to be jacking off and there is no amount of arcs where characters process trauma that will undo that. your standard anime shittiness simply does not compare
it's fantastic, it's so nice seeing adult women spending pleasant time together in a grounded way
you'll notice i didn't include dragon ball on the list of anime that didn't have sex pest stuff or fascism! and again, there's a big difference between dragon ball and goblin slayer
you're basically saying "all 80s movies love sexual assault, so it's fine that i like revenge of the nerds," and when i respond with a list of 80s movies that don't have any sexual assault or harrassment in them you say "well have you seen how han treats leia in star wars?" those are two very different things! both are bad, but they are at very different levels of it
re: hormones. anecdotally i know a bunch of trans women whose dicks still work. they still get hard, they still orgasm, and they still produce cum. similarly, i know trans women who didn't lose any muscle while on e. you'd need to work out a bunch and it takes effort, but it's very possible
ultimately it is your choice, but neither of those two factors are as insurmountable as you seem to think
cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/2764090
it's definitely also out wherever you get movies illicitly, so you can watch it for free wherever you are. now there's no excuse not to watch it, for all the reasons i laid out in this post. great movie about drowning in dysphoria and suffocating in the closet
it's still available legally on youtube and illegally wherever you go for that, but this sucks!
cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/2591726
i don't have the first idea of how to talk about this movie. you need to see it, especially if you're trans. even more if you're transfem, and most of all if you're transfem or questioning but haven't come out or started transition yet. i cannot recommend it enough, it's in theaters now and you should see it there if at all possible. this is going to be kind of a mess because this movie made me feel so many emotions i have no idea how to properly express, but i'll do my best
this movie is about you if you've ever felt trapped in your own body, feeling like you're drowning and not knowing why. if you've ever loved a work of art so much it became the lens you saw the world through and felt alienated because of how the people around you didn't get it. if you've ever been stuck in a small town and known something was wrong, this isn't how things are supposed to be, life isn't meant to be like this. but most of all, if you've ever looked at yourself in the mirror and cried because you'll die looking like this. if you've known you'll die as a man and nothing is scarier than that, but what other choice do you have? you might even know there's another option, but it seems impossible and it's almost scarier than dying like this
this is a movie about a lot of things, but first and foremost it is about being a transgender woman in that time when you know in the back of your mind that that is what you are but are too scared to truly let that out. some people are saying this is subtext, which is absurd. the main character is transgender. this is the text of the film
there will be some spoilers after this point, because i can't keep talking around the actual movie itself, though i'll avoid anything too major outside a spoiler tag
the main character (who i am going to refer to as isabel and with she/her pronouns because it makes me feel nauseous to refer to her with the name she goes by for almost the entire movie) is a closeted transgender woman growing up in the 1990s. the movie is about her and a friend (maddy, who is a lesbian) bonding over a show (called the pink opaque) that they connect to in a way they can't connect with the world around them. isabel is trans and in the closet and she never leaves the closet. she never says she is trans, or that she's a girl, or tries to live as a woman. she is in the closet, she is too scared to say the words. maddy recognizes this in her, tries to push her to express herself, but isabel doesn't. she lives her life as a man, pushes maddy away every time maddy reaches out. maddy gets out of the small conservative suburb they live in, changes her name to tara to reject the past. even so, tara never found a community. she comes back one last time to try and get isabel to come with her
spoilers for the end of the film
the most harrowing scene in the film comes after isabel rejects tara. she's too scared to leave the home she knows, deciding all the pain that comes with her life as a man is better than going into the unknown and living as a woman. as she walks home she passes by chalk writing on the street in the same handwriting and color as when she would get notes from maddy about the pink opaque back in high school. the chalk reads "it's not too late" and "there is still time". she ignores it, walks past it. in a voiceover she says "it was time i became a productive member of society, it was time i became a man." it still exists in her no matter how hard she tries to reject it, but she buries it as much as she can. we see her decades later, still living that life no matter how obvious it is that the pink opaque and her true identity are within her. there is still time but she doesn't believe that. she's convinced herself it's too late, that she's made her choice and has to stick to it. she accidentally lets some of these buried emotions slip out and as the film ends she's apologizing to everyone around her for making such a mistake as they completely ignore her, her alienation stronger than eversome of the pieces of the transfem experience that show up in this movie i've never seen anything else touch on. the way that men around you will try and bond with you and you can't follow along. you fuck up, and they realize on some level that you're different and they grow hostile to you. the crushing weight of those around you constantly scrutinizing you for anything you do being too effeminate, and how even when that isn't the thing they're looking for it's what you're scared they'll find. the way many of us gravitate towards other queer people even when we can't define ourselves, and can't answer why when people ask
this movie is drenched in the crushing weight of dysphoria. it's impossible to describe to someone who hasn't seen it, or to someone who hasn't lived it. the one time a character's actor changes is when isabel goes from 7th grade, played by a kid of the right age, to 9th grade, played by an adult man. this shift in her body, the way she views herself, is so dramatic it feels slightly ridiculous, but that's how it is. when she looks at herself in the mirror, when she is talking to her father, when she deals with customers or coworkers or gets called "sir" at the drive through it feels like she's being hit with a hammer. it beats her down until she has no hope, no matter how much the world around her and the one person who sees her for who she is tell her otherwise. it's not too late, it's never too late. there is always still time. but she can't, she's been crushed into her assigned role and is too scared to leave. it's maybe the saddest movie i've ever seen
i know people who saw this movie and realized this would be them if they didn't find the courage to come out. a friend called her mom and came out right after watching it. on letterboxd several reviews are from women who only realized what they were through this film. it might be the single most transgender thing i've ever seen
i haven't talked at all about one of the major plotlines of the movie, because it's something i think would be better not spoiled and it's not as important for this pitch. and i want to be clear this is a kind of weird movie, it does not have moments of catharsis and it can be hard to follow from scene to scene. it's very lynchian in the truest sense of that, it's david lynch if he was a trans millennial. it's labeled as horror by many but it isn't truly scary, more existentially troubling. a movie that makes me feel like i'm dying, but not one that scared me in any kind of horror movie way
i wanna just put some words from other people here, add some slightly different perspectives
these ones have spoilers
I've never seen a movie so laser-focused at one specific group: this is an arrow aimed directly at trans or questioning people in their mid 20s to mid 40s who have grappled with the fear of transitioning.
The horror of this film is the horror of the refusal of the call, and the comfort of the numbing normal keeping you from true happiness. The horror of "but I don't WANT to face fear and risk of death to live as my true self". The horror of knowing deep down that it will all be better, but of being so scared that you never take that horrifying step.
I watched it as a BLINDINGLY unsubtle movie aimed at the genderqueer audience. It hit and it hurt because I KNOW girls stuck in the same cycle that our Isabel/Owen is stuck in. It was horrifying on a level that got under my skin and stuck deep. The metaphor of suffocation and rebirth is a compelling one for transition, and the fear of death that accompanies it is something that I think every trans person has dealt with.
I watched it in theater. I had a cis queer film nerd friend with me, and everyone else watching this matinee appeared to be cis men. I heard a lot of grumbling and questioning from the boys in attendance. Lots of "Going to have to think on it", which is film nerd for "I didn't get it". My cis friend caught the trans allegory but missed most of the connections. I think that it's not going to land for a lot of people.
when maddy tells owen she likes girls and asks him if he does too, he says (to paraphrase) “i don’t know, i like tv shows. when i think about that stuff, it feels like someone’s ripped me open and tore out all my organs.” after he watches the finale of the pink opaque, he’s vomiting the blue luna juice and sobbing about how this isn’t real, which i relate to like feeling trapped in this unaccepting environment . he does this right after realizing he is isabel, but he still hides it and shoved it down and represses it. then there’s obviously the end, where he cuts himself open in the bathroom and sees the static inside of himself for what it is. it calls back to the line “it feels like someone’s ripped me open and tore out my organs.” which was a REPONSE to being asked about specifically sexuality and more broadly, queerness. there aren’t organs there. there’s the static. he was right and it’s a relief and it’s terrifying and it’s full of guilt and shame and regret and fear. it’s the experience of seeing yourself after years of hiding and repression and it’s directly a queer experience. like hello
i don't have the first idea of how to talk about this movie. you need to see it, especially if you're trans. even more if you're transfem, and most of all if you're transfem or questioning but haven't come out or started transition yet. i cannot recommend it enough, it's in theaters now and you should see it there if at all possible. this is going to be kind of a mess because this movie made me feel so many emotions i have no idea how to properly express, but i'll do my best
this movie is about you if you've ever felt trapped in your own body, feeling like you're drowning and not knowing why. if you've ever loved a work of art so much it became the lens you saw the world through and felt alienated because of how the people around you didn't get it. if you've ever been stuck in a small town and known something was wrong, this isn't how things are supposed to be, life isn't meant to be like this. but most of all, if you've ever looked at yourself in the mirror and cried because you'll die looking like this. if you've known you'll die as a man and nothing is scarier than that, but what other choice do you have? you might even know there's another option, but it seems impossible and it's almost scarier than dying like this
this is a movie about a lot of things, but first and foremost it is about being a transgender woman in that time when you know in the back of your mind that that is what you are but are too scared to truly let that out. some people are saying this is subtext, which is absurd. the main character is transgender. this is the text of the film
there will be some spoilers after this point, because i can't keep talking around the actual movie itself, though i'll avoid anything too major outside a spoiler tag
the main character (who i am going to refer to as isabel and with she/her pronouns because it makes me feel nauseous to refer to her with the name she goes by for almost the entire movie) is a closeted transgender woman growing up in the 1990s. the movie is about her and a friend (maddy, who is a lesbian) bonding over a show (called the pink opaque) that they connect to in a way they can't connect with the world around them. isabel is trans and in the closet and she never leaves the closet. she never says she is trans, or that she's a girl, or tries to live as a woman. she is in the closet, she is too scared to say the words. maddy recognizes this in her, tries to push her to express herself, but isabel doesn't. she lives her life as a man, pushes maddy away every time maddy reaches out. maddy gets out of the small conservative suburb they live in, changes her name to tara to reject the past. even so, tara never found a community. she comes back one last time to try and get isabel to come with her
some of the pieces of the transfem experience that show up in this movie i've never seen anything else touch on. the way that men around you will try and bond with you and you can't follow along. you fuck up, and they realize on some level that you're different and they grow hostile to you. the crushing weight of those around you constantly scrutinizing you for anything you do being too effeminate, and how even when that isn't the thing they're looking for it's what you're scared they'll find. the way many of us gravitate towards other queer people even when we can't define ourselves, and can't answer why when people ask
this movie is drenched in the crushing weight of dysphoria. it's impossible to describe to someone who hasn't seen it, or to someone who hasn't lived it. the one time a character's actor changes is when isabel goes from 7th grade, played by a kid of the right age, to 9th grade, played by an adult man. this shift in her body, the way she views herself, is so dramatic it feels slightly ridiculous, but that's how it is. when she looks at herself in the mirror, when she is talking to her father, when she deals with customers or coworkers or gets called "sir" at the drive through it feels like she's being hit with a hammer. it beats her down until she has no hope, no matter how much the world around her and the one person who sees her for who she is tell her otherwise. it's not too late, it's never too late. there is always still time. but she can't, she's been crushed into her assigned role and is too scared to leave. it's maybe the saddest movie i've ever seen
i know people who saw this movie and realized this would be them if they didn't find the courage to come out. a friend called her mom and came out right after watching it. on letterboxd several reviews are from women who only realized what they were through this film. it might be the single most transgender thing i've ever seen
i haven't talked at all about one of the major plotlines of the movie, because it's something i think would be better not spoiled and it's not as important for this pitch. and i want to be clear this is a kind of weird movie, it does not have moments of catharsis and it can be hard to follow from scene to scene. it's very lynchian in the truest sense of that, it's david lynch if he was a trans millennial. it's labeled as horror by many but it isn't truly scary, more existentially troubling. a movie that makes me feel like i'm dying, but not one that scared me in any kind of horror movie way
i wanna just put some words from other people here, add some slightly different perspectives
these ones have spoilers
I've never seen a movie so laser-focused at one specific group: this is an arrow aimed directly at trans or questioning people in their mid 20s to mid 40s who have grappled with the fear of transitioning.
The horror of this film is the horror of the refusal of the call, and the comfort of the numbing normal keeping you from true happiness. The horror of "but I don't WANT to face fear and risk of death to live as my true self". The horror of knowing deep down that it will all be better, but of being so scared that you never take that horrifying step.
I watched it as a BLINDINGLY unsubtle movie aimed at the genderqueer audience. It hit and it hurt because I KNOW girls stuck in the same cycle that our Isabel/Owen is stuck in. It was horrifying on a level that got under my skin and stuck deep. The metaphor of suffocation and rebirth is a compelling one for transition, and the fear of death that accompanies it is something that I think every trans person has dealt with.
I watched it in theater. I had a cis queer film nerd friend with me, and everyone else watching this matinee appeared to be cis men. I heard a lot of grumbling and questioning from the boys in attendance. Lots of "Going to have to think on it", which is film nerd for "I didn't get it". My cis friend caught the trans allegory but missed most of the connections. I think that it's not going to land for a lot of people.
when maddy tells owen she likes girls and asks him if he does too, he says (to paraphrase) “i don’t know, i like tv shows. when i think about that stuff, it feels like someone’s ripped me open and tore out all my organs.” after he watches the finale of the pink opaque, he’s vomiting the blue luna juice and sobbing about how this isn’t real, which i relate to like feeling trapped in this unaccepting environment . he does this right after realizing he is isabel, but he still hides it and shoved it down and represses it. then there’s obviously the end, where he cuts himself open in the bathroom and sees the static inside of himself for what it is. it calls back to the line “it feels like someone’s ripped me open and tore out my organs.” which was a REPONSE to being asked about specifically sexuality and more broadly, queerness. there aren’t organs there. there’s the static. he was right and it’s a relief and it’s terrifying and it’s full of guilt and shame and regret and fear. it’s the experience of seeing yourself after years of hiding and repression and it’s directly a queer experience. like hello
not only is 34 an important number in the when they cry series, this book takes place in 2017, meaning that the murders took place in 1983 WHICH IS THE YEAR HIGURASHI TAKES PLACE. also icymi 'when cicadas cry' is just a literal translation of higurashi no naku koro ni
this is just such a funny question. i can't imagine wanting this for the place i live
i've definitely talked about loran but i guess i somehow never mentioned guin! guin's treatment of loran is so important to my read of her as trans, because he's such a chaser it makes loran read as more trans because of how hard he's chasing