IT’S ALL MEDIOCRE DIME-A-DOZEN COMPLETELY AND UTTERLY USELESS APPS CHARGING $500/MO FOR GLORIFIED SPREADSHEETS, I HATE THESE FUCKING BILLBOARDS
DON’T THESE TECHBROS REALIZE THEY’RE JUST ANOTHER FORGETTABLE NOBODY AND NOT THE NEXT JOBS-LIKE GRIFTER?
SHOULD I START GRIFTING THESE TECHBRO ASSHOLES WITH JANKY PAYROLL SOFTWARE? SHOVELS IN A GOLD RUSH ETC ETC
The secret ingredient is lying. All the old timers, instructors, etc. would subtly, and sometimes not-so-subtly tell you to lie on your medical applications. I knew plenty who did this (obviously not me, the paragon of virtue). The truth is that if everyone always told the truth to the FAA, 90% of pilots today would not be flying. Pilots are people too, they have medical problems, and sometimes they even have emotions!
"Have you EVER been prescribed/diagnosed with..." casts a wide net.
This is, of course, incredibly illegal, so everyone who did it took a risk, but I guess they really wanted to fly. But at this point it's an open secret. The FAA is stuck in the 1920s. I've known airline pilots who were supposedly the epitome of health dropping dead at 45. The primary purpose of these restrictions is for the FAA to absolve themselves of any liability and pin all the blame for an incident on you because you're doing what everyone is doing and the headlines will read "Accident Pilot Lied about Medical Records to FAA" and imply that the Tylenol you took last night caused you to crash. They also don't check your records (except VA) because otherwise there'd be very few pilots.
I think they've made some progress though. If you're still taking SSRIs and are willing to put up with 1.5 years of back-and-forth (paper only) communication with the FAA you might get a medical certificate. If you've stopped taking them it's much simpler, I think it has to be 6 months and the doctor can certify that you can function without the medication. For colorblindness I think they can issue a certificate with a night flying limitation.
I was a pilot examiner for a few years. Sometimes I'd see 70+ year olds on death's doorstep getting a new rating who absolutely should not be flying and have obviously lied on their medical application, but whom I nonetheless had to pass because they technically fulfilled the requirements. As an instructor I've seen prospective students get canned for something they took 20 years ago.
Just be relieved if they leave it at accusing you of supporting gas chambers and don't change it to demanding you to support nuking Gaza.
Thanks for the lying advice, I've never attempted to obtain a license & had no clue to what extent the FAA or 'flight surgeons' (they really struck gold giving themselves that title) could breach HIPAA! I quit that shit damn near cold turkey 5 years ago.
I've just had my dad's dour take on the matter to go off of (dont tell the feds I've landed his 170 like 5 times—of course, only to train for the event of pilot incapacitation, naturally).
It used to be a lifetime grounding before 2010, so some people might not be aware of the new rules.
w.r.t. HIPAA, the flight surgeon/“aviation medical examiner” can see your records because you’re their patient, but only those you have on file with their specific group, i.e. Sutter Health. Most guys I know go out of group and out of network with someone a few cities over. It’s not exactly cheap but it’s once a year at most and it keeps them in the air.
Their rationale is that if something ever happens that leads to them being outed, that same something will have rendered them too dead to care.
And they’re right. The vast majority of drug testing in medical exams cannot detect SSRIs. Same goes for post-accident drug testing. They’re usually discovered through toxicology reports on the dearly departed.
To tell the truth, not disclosing an SSRI is the tamest lie to the FAA I would have come across yet.
That tracks with the testing, the most commonly screened substances (generally groups of substances sold as a 'panel') are readily converted to water-soluble metabolites in the body and are pissed out to sub-detectable levels in just ~4 days, the biggest exception being our big dry boy, kushbomb. Generally someone wanting to catch you pissing hot has to do so randomly.
This has been a wellspring of information, my sincerest thanks Mr. Ulyanov!