this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2024
88 points (100.0% liked)

the_dunk_tank

15915 readers
11 users here now

It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

Rule 1: All posts must include links to the subject matter, and no identifying information should be redacted.

Rule 2: If your source is a reactionary website, please use archive.is instead of linking directly.

Rule 3: No sectarianism.

Rule 4: TERF/SWERFs Not Welcome

Rule 5: No ableism of any kind (that includes stuff like libt*rd)

Rule 6: Do not post fellow hexbears.

Rule 7: Do not individually target other instances' admins or moderators.

Rule 8: The subject of a post cannot be low hanging fruit, that is comments/posts made by a private person that have low amount of upvotes/likes/views. Comments/Posts made on other instances that are accessible from hexbear are an exception to this. Posts that do not meet this requirement can be posted to !shitreactionariessay@lemmygrad.ml

Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Uhhh, what the fuck?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] aaaaaaadjsf@hexbear.net 51 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (1 children)

I'm glad he divorced his paranoid stalker of a wife. He just wanted to relax and have a beer after work at the brewery without telling his wife once, and she turned it into all this nonsense. Then she stalked his location constantly and made a big deal about him getting fast food without telling her once. Imagine being trapped in a marriage with such a controlling wife that you can't even go to McDonalds or have a beer after work without them freaking out. Nightmare scenario.

[–] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 20 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I think a deeper, core issue is being ignored. Why did he feel the need to lie to your partner about what he was doing? Why was he unable or unwilling to tell her that he's just having a beer? Is the issue that she would unfairly demand he not do this? Or is there some legitimate reason she might object? Either of these is indicative of a need to communicate about an issue.

In a healthy relationship, you should not only feel free to do what you want, you should also feel comfortable communicating these things with your partner. If you want to do something that would make your partner flip out, either there's something wrong with your desire or your partner's reaction and you need to talk about it.

[–] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 16 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Everything you said makes sense, but at the same time you can acknowledge that you need to communicate better without having the conversation right then and there. Both times the dude "transgressed" he was coming home from work. Probably tired, maybe had a bad day, I can see why he didn't want to negotiate beer or McDonalds with his wife right then and there.

Especially understandable is the beer. She admits that they had been having difficulties at home and maybe just needed some time alone to think. She knew where he was and texted him anyway.

[–] EmmaGoldman@hexbear.net 12 points 7 months ago

Personally, I would've already had that conversation pretty much as soon as I saw the problem, before even getting to the point where you're stopping off at McDonald's or the bar. It's pretty unlikely that the first time it occurs to you that your partner would be mad is when you're opening the door to the McDonald's.

Communicate early, communicate often.