this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2024
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chapotraphouse
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I don't see how someone telling their partner "if I saw you on the street I wouldn't find you immediately attractive" is something that wouldn't bother you. Maybe the dude is overreacting, especially since she seems conciliatory and apologetic, but if I'm suffering from a period of body dysmorphia and my S.O. tells me that it would hurt a lot. People like to feel desired and this compliment, intentional or not, could easily be taken as saying you're not.
She said she wants to marry him. how is that not a huge compliment? it also definitely implies sexual attraction. if my partner said that to me I'd be for weeks.
If you're in a good headspace I think your reaction is 100% percent typical and the right way to interpret it. The kicker is sometimes you just feel like shit about your body and that changes the way you understand it. I hope this guy gets over it because it clearly wasn't meant that way, but he'll have to work through his emotions to do it. It really does impede the way your mind works