this post was submitted on 24 Jan 2025
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chapotraphouse

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Literally did it on impulse without even thinking about it so I wouldn't chicken out, so I blurted it out.

I said "I'm bisexual. I like both men and women. No more anti-gay stuff from you, ok?".

He said, "oh go away, you don't know what you like". I think he'll understand eventually, he needs time to think.

EDIT: Showed him this thread.

I said: "Look, this is what I said to you, these are my online friends who are happy for me that I came out as bisexual."

He said: "Oh you don't know what you're talking about, you've never had sex with a man or a woman before, until then you'll never know."

And yeah, I am still holding on to my v-card at 26. I was insecure about that years ago in high school, but I'm honestly glad I've waited to mature first.

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[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 64 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

He said: "Oh you don't know what you're talking about, you've never had sex with a man or a woman before, until then you'll never know."

Ask your dad if he's had sex with a man to determine whether he is straight or not.

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 37 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

That's what I did, but he changed the subject. He'll think about it and understand it eventually, he's a boomer with all the associated brainrot so I guess he needs it to be personal before he develops enough empathy to understand.

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 17 points 2 weeks ago

I hope so comrade. Wish you the best of luck with that.

[–] HumanBehaviorByBjork@hexbear.net 47 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

the idea of someone thinking they're gay until they try gay sex is hilarious to me

[–] Hexboare@hexbear.net 19 points 2 weeks ago

"wait that's what that's for??"

[–] MaoTheLawn@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago

literally witnessed this happen multiple times

some people are curious

then they try it and realise their attraction doesn't go that far

[–] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 35 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Honestly that is pretty funny. It sucks but I could not help but chuckle. Hopefully he comes around.

Better than my brother doubling down on transphobia because he "has trans friends who are totally cool with slurs" like bro I assure you they are not.

I'm happy that you were able to say it. I hope he understands better I the future. I always think about how fortunate bi guys like us are to live in a time and place where we are free to be our true selves. hexbear-bi

[–] crime@hexbear.net 28 points 2 weeks ago

yes-hahaha-yes-r
gator-bi

Congrats comrade! Hope he does come around soon stalin-heart

[–] sempersigh@hexbear.net 27 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

just came out as dad to my bisexual partner

edit; not that i'm not also bisexual ofc let me be clear

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 14 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Damn, congratulations!!!

(i can interpret this comment in one of two ways: telling your partner you have a kid, or you found out your partner is pregnant)

But, uh, congrats either way!

[–] sempersigh@hexbear.net 24 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Actually I don’t have any human children I just meant dad as in im giving off those vibes or something now

I do have a son though here he is

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 17 points 2 weeks ago

Ahh! Well, I think that certainly counts! I'm sure he loves you very much!

[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 3 points 2 weeks ago

Is his name Abbath Doom Occulta?

[–] Infamousblt@hexbear.net 26 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

lets-fucking-go Proud of you comrade, that's awesome and so difficult. I'm sorry he didn't accept it right away. Hopefully he comes around sicko-queer

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 23 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah, gonna come out to my mom when she gets home from work later, but I already know she's ok with this, she's had the "it's ok to be gay" conversation with me before.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If you've had that conversation, she probably thinks you're gay...so bi may be easier news to swallow.

Sorry your dad was kind of a dick about it but like...at least he was only kind of a dick about it?

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Yeah, I know he loves me unconditionally. He's always been way more supportive of me about my drug addiction problems in the past than my mother was, so you win some you lose some.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm making some leaps here but it sounded like he was using the virginity thing to just avoid the issue and also kinda make a dig at you. I don't know you or your dad tho. However based on what he said, if he's never fucked any dudes how does he know he isn't bi? And if they're not gonna be a problem about it and you are interested in getting laid, it should be overwhelmingly easy if.you can seek out other guys openly.

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

It kinda was a dig at me, but I think he just doesn't want to think about me being with a man, it probably grosses him out, so he's denying it.

Not really interested in casual sex btw, waiting to fall in love first.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Fair enough. Just figured I'd point out it's basically no effort in case you were.

Anyway, glad it went well enough, does seem like a once the info settles you're probably fine kinda situation. Still a shitty reaction, there's no need to respond to something like that with an underhanded insult, but such is the way of Dads.

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 3 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Maybe this is too personal, but I just so happen to be sort of falling in love with a woman right now, and that kind of makes me sad because if that goes well my dad is probably just gonna keep denying I'm bi until he dies of old age.

[–] ghost_of_faso3@lemmygrad.ml 6 points 2 weeks ago

Dont ever get into the trap of thinking you need to date say, a man to 'validate' your bi-ness - bisexuals are valid even if they've never been in a romantic or sexual relationship with anyone, you know yourself what you're attracted too.

[–] cosecantphi@hexbear.net 23 points 2 weeks ago

I swear to god this thread is the Evangelion Shinji congratulations moment of my life.

congratulations

[–] machiabelly@hexbear.net 22 points 2 weeks ago

Proud of you possum-party

[–] SchillMenaker@hexbear.net 21 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Or, in the greatest dad-twist of all, he adds anti-straight stuff to his repertoire too. You can never escape.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

New type of guy: ace dad who imposes it on his kids

[–] crime@hexbear.net 15 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

My dad is this type of guy, can confirm that it's not a new type

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 18 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

In retrospect I suppose that isn't so uncommon. That's just a dad who's lost interest in sex and had a daughter Guy

[–] crime@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

yeah in his case I think it's mainly ex-catholic + undiagnosed autism, but surely there are a lot of combos that add up to this type of guy

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 10 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I was going for identifies as Ace and 'dammit if you live under my roof so are you!' Kinda thing. But there is a wide variety of clades in the Dad phylla that fit the description although usually though strange means.

[–] crime@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

smh when are we getting more funding into evolutionary Padrology so we can further study convergent branches of the Dad taxonomy

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

New art project unlocked! I'm gonna get a big giant piece of Bristol board and chart the Dad biological tree. This is already one of those too many ideas that I need to narrow down things

[–] AlephNull@hexbear.net 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

dad taxonomy bristol stool chart go

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 5 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I knew what you mea r before the edit and it was funnier

[–] AlephNull@hexbear.net 4 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

brb plotting dad phylogeny on a bristol stool chart-glasgow coma scale graph

edit: classic phil

[–] Firstnamebunchofnumbers@hexbear.net 20 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I just told my Bisexual that i'm dad

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 8 points 2 weeks ago
[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 18 points 2 weeks ago

Lol, your dad's the only one confused about what you're attracted to. Tell your dad to stop being dumb, people know who and what they like.

[–] Wendy_Pleakley@hexbear.net 17 points 2 weeks ago

congratulations!

biderman

[–] fossilesque@mander.xyz 14 points 2 weeks ago

Congrats. :) Bi dudes are best dudes.

[–] JustSo@hexbear.net 14 points 2 weeks ago

Yo that's big of you and cool. My dad was kind of a dingus about my transness but he's super supportive and loving now, just took time. He's a total boomer too. They're just a bit calcified in the brain I think.

[–] MiraculousMM@hexbear.net 13 points 2 weeks ago

This mirrors much of what I'd expect my dad to say if I espoused my blatantly commie views to him. I think you're right about older folks needing to ruminate on our ideas for a bit to warm up to them.

I hope your dad gets there comrade penguin-love

[–] KrasMazov@lemmygrad.ml 12 points 2 weeks ago

Congrats comrade!!! It takes a lot of courage to come out. Hopefully your dad comes around to it soon.

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Congratulations. It's a weight off your back.

kirby-wave Hi cosecantphi's dad. He's being open and honest with you. It's ok. That's a good thing! Ask your son some questions. He might not know everything. He might have a preference one way or the other, but he likes both so just respect him and their partner, whover that may be and still be a loving father to them both. It's ok 👍Now hug! meow-hug

[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Cowbee@hexbear.net 9 points 2 weeks ago

Congrats! It sucks that your dad is denying you, but hopefully that's a weight off your chest. meow-hug

[–] ikilledtheradiostar@hexbear.net 4 points 2 weeks ago

He really pulled the you're bi, biyourself lol

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 2 points 2 weeks ago

!chapotraphouse is a comm about being bi with* your dad

*with = "in the context of"

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