this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2024
75 points (95.2% liked)

Slop.

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For posting all the anonymous reactionary bullshit that you can't post anywhere else.

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what does this have to do with being single? your wife didnt let you drink beer and eat beans? quit shitting yourself then ☠️

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[–] godlessworm@hexbear.net 55 points 6 months ago (2 children)

also i bet this dude just wrote this menu out for reddit and is gonna eat hungry man frozen meals all week

[–] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

That’s pretty clearly not this guy’s handwriting imo

[–] mechwarrior2@hexbear.net 14 points 6 months ago

How are you, as a man, writing in the live laugh love font

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 39 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (7 children)

As someone who drinks 250-700mL of grain alcohol a day 5-6 days a week:

This man needs to drink less. He's not even doing it as a coping mechanism or to stave off withdrawal. He's drinking to be cringe.

[–] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 16 points 6 months ago (3 children)

My alcohol consumption was about this at one stage from like... Really intense boredom and debt. I'm pretty sure I was getting most of my calories from alcohol. :/

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[–] invalidusernamelol@hexbear.net 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

He's only drinking 2 times a week according to this menu.

Beer and champagne on Tuesday and 3 beers on Thursday.

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 12 points 6 months ago

That's 2 times too many if those two instances of drinking are cringe.

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[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

did you know: all the foods on that list are still edible if you have a significant other?

[–] Rivalarrival@lemmy.today 6 points 6 months ago (2 children)

You know how I know you're single?

[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 37 points 6 months ago

the fact that i post about it too much in the trans mega?

[–] Riffraffintheroom@hexbear.net 12 points 6 months ago

Please develop a personality

[–] NewOldGuard@hexbear.net 27 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Man’s allergic to fiber lmao, guess regular BMs and not dying of colorectal cancer from red meat are just too feminine for this macho man

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[–] thefartographer@lemm.ee 27 points 6 months ago

That's crazy! I can eat that shit AND hold my wife's hand while doing it because I cook all the meals in our house. Wanna know why I don't eat like that every night? Cuz it's not worth the constipated internal diarrhea.

[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 26 points 6 months ago (6 children)

Tuesday: pizza, beer, and champagne. Uhhhh this is probably the most problematic thing here. I don't have an issue with the post otherwise, he's just finding the positive side of being single (not having to worry about what your partner wants to eat)

[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 11 points 6 months ago (1 children)

I guess it's because it's New Year's Eve?

[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 6 points 6 months ago (2 children)

I just don't think champagne pairs very well with beer...

[–] john_brown@hexbear.net 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

allow me to introduce you to the champagne of beers, miller high life

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[–] Orcocracy@hexbear.net 23 points 6 months ago

Is this what a millennial midlife crisis looks like? Obviously we don’t have boomer money, so buying a sports car is out of the question.

[–] blunder@hexbear.net 21 points 6 months ago (3 children)

Lots of fun tidbits here:

  • this handwriting reads as VERY femme to me
  • lol at permabanned account taking screenshot 07
  • okra gumbo sounds good as fuck
[–] D61@hexbear.net 11 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

waiting for the post with green and red lines representing masc and fem writing angles last-bit-of-hope

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[–] Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 6 months ago

Handwriting is HELLA femme

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[–] Ram_The_Manparts@hexbear.net 21 points 6 months ago

Does he not eat on saturday

[–] ObamnaSoda@hexbear.net 19 points 6 months ago

Does the post say if he sleeps in a racing car?

[–] ElChapoDeChapo@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

On the one hand I really want to dunk on this guy but on the other hand the fact that he plans his weekly meals in advance means he's got his shit together way more than I do so I'm really in no position to say shit

[–] Yukiko@hexbear.net 18 points 6 months ago (2 children)

That is such an awful diet.

[–] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 20 points 6 months ago

i have pretty bad issues with food avoidance and even my diet is better than this smh

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] CocteauChameleons@hexbear.net 15 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Gumbo, oysters, and boudin sounds good rn

[–] infuziSporg@hexbear.net 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Realistically, working at a factory or warehouse job, most of your meals are from a machine or a fast-food restaurant, unless you have someone at home packing your lunch. For me most days it was cereal for breakfast, one of my sandwiches for lunch, and leftovers for dinner. In-between I'd make large batches of soup or rice or dal or pasta, sometimes they'd be lunch and sometimes they'd be dinner. But on top of a fulltime job it was exhausting, and it makes sense how I was one of very few people who made their own packed lunches.

Having a diverse menu where you don't repeat an item over 2 weeks is a luxury that's only possible if a homemaker is putting a lot of hours into cooking, or if it's mess hall/buffet style.

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[–] WhatDoYouMeanPodcast@hexbear.net 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

"as an X, Y, Z" always gives me a framing of skepticism and defensiveness. Credentialed posting feels gross to me. Appealing to Reddit is dirty work.

I'd actually, perhaps controversially, give a first impression that he cooks alright for himself. I notice that he's doing this in relation to the new year. I've been eating pretty dogshit recently, juggling and letting drop social opportunities and obligations. Okra gumbo, oysters, and black eyed peas make me feel like somebody's home in his brain.

There's more than meets the eye here.

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