I've long since made my mind up that should I ever reach my lowest again and seriously considering suicide, that I'll just fucking do it before I ever subject myself to an institution. Absolutely one of the worst 3 day spans of my life at a point where I was already absurdly vulnerable. Stuck in a holding cell for 20 hours with a severe migraine from the shitty lighting with literally nothing to do beyond think about how shitty everything is because they took all my shit, be misgendered nonstop, when I start getting angry after someone scolds me for tearing up the styrofoam cup because I was beyond bored getting security called on me and having them take the table out of the room. Getting put in a room finally and getting new face after new face ask me the exact same questions and scold me for getting angry when they misgendered me. They never told my family anything so my family assumed they couldn't contact me so I got to feel abandoned by my family. Got told that I need to stop getting angry at them or they're going to involuntarily commit me and keep me longer or take me to the "more secure" ward where they'll force drugs on me.

What I got out of the experience was trauma, a severe anxiety about seeking healthcare despite being a healthcare worker, a diagnosis of BPD which is beyond incorrect, and some drugs that made me feel unlike myself that I pretty quickly just stopped taking.

This organization a few years later was touting how LGBT friendly they were which is such a fucking joke.