How about a speech from the average joe
this post was submitted on 07 Feb 2025
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Idk if this varies but when/where I was in highschool they used the unweighted GPA to determine class rank or something like that so while there were all these people that slogged through AP and honors courses paying very close attention to their GPA, the valedictorian ended up being some dude (who in academic terms was nowhere near as talented as some of the others) who coasted through the mid level courses with a near perfect GPA.
The actual smartest person in my class though was this dude that was nowhere near the top of the class because he never did his homework but he was far and away smarter than anyone and a decent musician too. He never got any recognition for it from the school though.
At my high school the valedictorian was put to a vote, so the most generally likeable person was valedictorian lol. It was the class clown
Next time just @ me. Found out that the universities I wanted to go to wouldn't accept fancy class credits so I never bothered with them. Musician guy was truly brilliant and a great friend though, wish I knew what they were up to these days.
having grades in high school is wild. death to america
Wait, other countries don't have this?
i live in western europe and it's not normal to my knowledge. in Ireland nothing means shit in high school basically until the one big set of exams at the end which is all that determines what college you can get into. no exam or assignment you do in the 6 years leading up to that matters at all except for certain subjects which might have some projects and stuff in your final year that contribute partially. which obviously is a system with its own severe downsides lol but I'll take it over having to care about grades when I'm like 15 fuck that. we also don't have to write letters and shit or care about extracurriculars to get into college, it's a purely mathematical process based on how you do in your final set of exams.
That rules. I was always "smart" but didn't get serious about studying until I was almost 20. I think a lot of people are like that, and yet we weed them out in a way that denies them contributing to society the way they really could.
You'd probably hear more about material conditions like poverty, an unstable home, or lack of accommodations at school, so they'd never do it.
But having a time slot dedicated to one person who made it to the top is an early part of capitalist myth making. They want a justification of the status quo, not its condemnation.
the kids with the "lowest" grades were generally not present, unless we're talking about "lowest grade but still actually graduating" which was probably similar. the struggling households put pressure on teenagers to work and provide household income, and that makes the 6-8 hours of schooling wasted time. all the "truant" kids I knew had jobs.
but what used to really drive me nuts as a kid is that the valedictorian was always a safe selection. there was always an "out" for the high achieving student who didn't want the title so it could be passed off to a career-oriented striver... the one who would deliver a message administration liked and not make waves or use the platform to make a statement.
looking back it was a very instructive lesson in how institutional power is deployed to steer people into acting in support of it.
Being real how many teenagers are able to articulate this? The idea that material reality has a measurable effect on people isn't even accepted in most of the USA. The lie of "work hard for good results, people deserve their place in the hierarchy" still has most adults fooled.
Also for the record me and my friends were cool communists who read theory when we were 16 (unironically, genuinely, not a joke). Just gotta flex on everyone who took until adulthood to become cool
It's also safe to assume that the vast majority of teenagers would rather die than get up in front of their entire school to give a speech for the explicit reason that they're the worst student there.
Yeah for sure, also one of the most brilliant people I've ever known, consistently at the top of their class, was a queer person from a poor single parent family, and a lot of the people who underperformed in class were from wealthy farming families. So even if someone with terrible grades had to speak, they probably wouldn't bring up material conditions
50/50 on being an insane unhinged trauma dump or speech about how socializing and having fun is more important than studying and good grades
I don't think it would be unhinged so much as an act of catharsis by giving a neglected student a microphone to explain how the system failed them. But yeah, some students get there with no regrets.
This is a thing?
American schools are weird
It can be worse. Sometimes they honor and give recognition to students who will join the military after graduation. Or at least they did at mine.
Death to america
Is that...the nostalgia critic?
I think it's the avgn actually
yeah it's big nerd bragging rights to be selected as valedictorian
Big weird
Yes, my high school had top 2 students by grade and the student president give speeches
It was awful
presentation on how to perform various cod zombies easter eggs
It would arguably be a better speech too
Probably hear less about Harry Potter and other vapid bullshit. (Yes, one at my college actually mentioned JKR and HP)
I bet they wouldn't spend the entire time jacking their ego off and then listing their entire family tree
The only discernable difference between educated liberals and uneducated ones is that the uneducated ones are worse at hiding their hate and ignorance.
to those of us who this would have been, im curious what your speech would have said
mine would have just been “many of you dont know me” and then i walk off
keep em guessing
I would have just quoted StarCraft Brood war
Dearest Helena,
By now, the news of our defeat has reached the Earth. The creatures we were sent here to tame are untameable, and the colonies we were sent to reclaim have proven to be stronger than we anticipated.
Whatever you may hear about what has happened out here, know this: Alexei did not die gloriously in battle. I killed him ― My pride killed him. And now my pride has consumed me as well.
You will never see me again, Helena.
Tell our children that I love them, and that their father died in defense of their future.
Au Revoir.
would've been my chance
me with a 52-6% average passing all classes for most of highschool