I took time out of my day to watch the Nintendo Direct and it was all SLOP AND BULLSHIT! FUCK YOU NINTENDO

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“Chuck season is open”? I dunno just workshopping

when was charlie kirk shot?

september 10th.

what happened one day after that?

september 11th.

nobody is talking about september 11th today tho. its all charlie kirk. they’re distracting you.

what’s the one thing you swore to god on your life you would never EVER do?

forget.

they want you to forget 9/11.

why?

so they can do it again

donald trump is sad

I think you should stick with tradition and use a guitar for your protest songs.

When are we gonna do something about vamp violence?

guitar riff intensifies

You know how everyone always talks about their what they’d do if they could have a wish come true like a fairytale? I remember doing that as a kid. Aladdin had just come out and everyone was talking about what they’d wish for. Million dollars was a top one. Invincibility another. Laser eyes.

But a genie gives you three wishes, and most people obsess over how to use their wishes to the fullest potential. Or… with three wishes you can wish for more mundane wishes. I wished I no longer had to poop.

But genies are tricky, you have to be specific. So instead I would need some kind of intestinal collar. A machine that obliterates any poop before it gets to the colon. It would have to be a machine, too, as I might need to remotely disable it. I don’t really want to require surgery - or another genie - to turn it off. I might need to shit in the future for personal or political purposes.

The device would require only about my life expectancy x 1.2 or 1.5 times if I really think I’ll hang in there. Nothing beyond the powers of a genie.

As you can see I really worked this all out. No more wiping poop. But I never told people about this. Maybe just wishing I didn’t have to poop.

I never told anyone about the Star Trek inspired colon zapper. If they invented one I’d probably get it installed. I’d feel pretty vindicated.

Mods deleted my posts (obviously).

May your hearts be full of joy, and your jets filled with fuel

one good shot directly to the vein
Charlie Rain, and now look at how his neck is sprayin'

Charlie Rain, establishment is thoughts and prayin'
Charlie Rain, and bullshit libs demand you express pain

Charlie Rain, while all cool folks are out here celebratin'
Charlie Rain, his tiny face burnin' in Hell with Satan

etc.

Skill issue. I personally wouldn’t have gotten shot. I would’ve done a dodge roll and used invincibility frames to avoid the bullet.

y'all are gonna be laughing then too i guess idk why i led with that

He was a real bad jerk!