this post was submitted on 11 Jan 2024
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chapotraphouse

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[–] Chapo_is_Red@hexbear.net 46 points 10 months ago (6 children)

100 total extractions

88 from soldiers

10 from civilians

Who were the remaining two?

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 51 points 10 months ago

Friendly fire self extrations

[–] ProfessorAdonisCnut@hexbear.net 33 points 10 months ago

Those 2 failed to meet Ashkenazi blood quantum requirements , so the gene-seed was not retained

[–] ImmortanStalin@lemmygrad.ml 23 points 10 months ago

Got shot in the nuts lol

[–] alexandra_kollontai@hexbear.net 22 points 10 months ago

Me. Felt so good I volunteered a second time

[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 16 points 10 months ago

A couple of the crew from the semen extraction team got a little hot and bothered from all the cum pumping.

[–] SerLava@hexbear.net 14 points 10 months ago

Paramilitary cum from irregular troops

[–] CrushKillDestroySwag@hexbear.net 45 points 10 months ago

Imagine being the wife of a dead conscript and the guys from the government show up with bad news - and then they hand you a turkey baster and look at you expectantly.

[–] Dr_Gabriel_Aby@hexbear.net 44 points 10 months ago (3 children)

How is this a thing instead of just demanding conscripted soldiers to donate to a bank at basic training?

Like it’s gotta be cheaper to do that then to train sperm removal from the dead and logistically moving sperm on a battlefield

[–] huf@hexbear.net 32 points 10 months ago (1 children)

did the soldiers sign some paper to this effect before they died? or is it legal to steal cum out of dead bodies in israel and ukraine now?

this feels like it should be illegal...

[–] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 5 points 10 months ago

and ukraine

Wait what?

this feels like it should be illegal...

New Israeli porn just dropped: xxxBARELY LEGAL, HOT EXTRACTION!xxxAVERAGE LOOKING SOLDIER SCREAMS YAMETE KUDASAI SEMPAI!xxx

[–] mar_k@hexbear.net 11 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Nah for hundred of thousands of people? Freezing sperm costs hundreds of dollars a year per person, they have to run that shit at like -320 degrees F

[–] Dr_Gabriel_Aby@hexbear.net 18 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Yea now imagine needing to do that for 98 people on a battlefield and they are dead, I imagine the cost is easily over 1 million per ejaculate in terms of manpower and logistics

[–] oregoncom@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago
[–] operacion_ogro@hexbear.net 9 points 10 months ago

There must be some law or regulation in Israel that prevents the forcible donation of tissue/organs/cum from soldiers but allows the extraction of those things from dead bodies. Which kind of blows my mind because in the US soldiers get railroaded into doing a lot of healthcare shit

[–] DyingOfDeBordom@hexbear.net 40 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

Ofc they saved the semen but not the sewomen

[–] DanComrd@hexbear.net 31 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What about the sechildren? anakin-padme-3

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 19 points 10 months ago

won't somebody please think of the sechildren?!

[–] mustGo@hexbear.net 38 points 10 months ago (1 children)
[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 35 points 10 months ago (5 children)

So why exactly do they pilfer dead soldier sperm?

Oh so people can't have hobbies now

[–] Tomboys_are_Cute@hexbear.net 57 points 10 months ago (1 children)

The official line is that its by request of their spouses so that they can have another kid with their late soldier (usually) partner. I don't think any other country has a sperm extraction battalion, I think this is what happens when you give an ethnostate infinity money.

[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 10 points 10 months ago

Makes much more sense to build an entire squad of cummandos to do emergency cum retrieval missions in a warzone than to... have the soldier freeze their sperm before deploying

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 44 points 10 months ago

Maintain pureblood lines. Totally normal and not insane fanatical ethnofascist reasons.

[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 20 points 10 months ago

The ducks at the park are free pasta, but for soldier jizz

[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 16 points 10 months ago

Just normal stuff that normal people do

[–] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 34 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Didn’t some Israeli minister of women say the 14 words recently?

[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 28 points 10 months ago

We must secure the existence of our cum and a future for white semen

[–] kleeon@hexbear.net 33 points 10 months ago

liberal zionists be like: "this is a completely normal country worth defending"

[–] ComradeOohAah@hexbear.net 31 points 10 months ago

Geez, I really have get my ass in gear on my VR Milking game {cw: probably NSFW} or Activision is gonna beat me to the punch with their next Call of Duty.

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 31 points 10 months ago (5 children)

The thing that's stuck out to me, is why don't they sperm bank? Like, if it's that important to you then why not do it ahead of time? Or do these psychos want it fresh from a corpse so they can attach some sort of harrowing story to it?... Sounds fashy, so it's probably the case.

[–] GhostSpider@hexbear.net 25 points 10 months ago (1 children)

The sperm bank is a good idea but is a little bit too consent dependent.

Dead men can't say "no" think-about-it

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 15 points 10 months ago

It's because they dont think they'll die. Just a quick murder tour and then home by the evening.

[–] o_d@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 10 months ago

It's funny to think about this as a "perk" of joining the IOF, but they don't need to offer any since everyone has to serve. It saves offering it to anyone who doesn't get got.

[–] WithoutFurtherBelay@hexbear.net 5 points 10 months ago (2 children)

Isn’t masturbation a wrong act in Judaism?

[–] huf@hexbear.net 8 points 10 months ago

i think the main sin of onan was spilling his cum on the ground, so i think wanking is fine as long as you eat it afterwards.

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 6 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Probs depends on which flavor.

[–] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 4 points 10 months ago

Hey they banned the medic team from tasting it after the last time; they lost several bloodlines that way.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] SerLava@hexbear.net 30 points 10 months ago

Press [F] to extract cum

[–] chickentendrils@hexbear.net 27 points 10 months ago

This is the transparency liberals were talking about

[–] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 26 points 10 months ago

measurehead STRATEGIC SEMEN RESERVES

[–] Tachanka@hexbear.net 23 points 10 months ago

Someone posts a Ben Garrison Cum Edit and Israel be like "ok this but unironically"

[–] nothx@hexbear.net 19 points 10 months ago

Totally normal…

[–] DanComrd@hexbear.net 18 points 10 months ago

They really balls'd it up, didn't they?

[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 16 points 10 months ago

We must secure the jizzum of our people and a future for Zionist children

[–] idkmybffjoeysteel@hexbear.net 10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Instead of employing a high stakes semen extraction unit, they could take sperm donations from consenting terrorists while they are alive, but I guess that would not make for effective propaganda.

[–] OrionsMask@hexbear.net 10 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

Imagine being born and finding out that your government extracted you from your dead father's war criminal ballsack.