this post was submitted on 16 Mar 2024
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chapotraphouse

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[–] SSJ2Marx@hexbear.net 114 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (6 children)

get home from work in the United Soviet States of America in 2024

thirty hour weeks are tough, but I get more vacation days than most people in order to make up for it

boot up my home PC, an Electronika 9100 XMT

it's located in my garage, in a standard rack mount along with its standard power source and network components

head to the terminal in my living room to actually use it

computer monitor makes a satisfying hum as it comes to life

see the logo for the default OS pop up

it's a Linux distribution maintained by the Computing Centre of the Academy of Sciences

it's good enough

go into Firefox, log onto my favorite website

it's called Hexbear, it's a pretty standard BBCode forum

see that I have a private message

a comrade is calling me a revisionist

they sent me a picture of a pig pooping on its balls

[–] blakeus12@hexbear.net 55 points 8 months ago (1 children)

please let this be a new site tagline

[–] Aquilae@hexbear.net 35 points 8 months ago (2 children)
[–] SSJ2Marx@hexbear.net 28 points 8 months ago

I'm honored

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[–] yoink@hexbear.net 26 points 8 months ago

same as it ever was same as it ever was

[–] Omniraptor@hexbear.net 12 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

my garage

😐

Ryazanov didn't die for this

[–] Blep@hexbear.net 6 points 8 months ago

I mean you gotta do something with the space once cars are made unnecessary

[–] Beaver@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago

I'm feeling a melancholy nostalgia for an alternate history that never was

[–] ashinadash@hexbear.net 56 points 8 months ago

>reddit alt history

>anime brainworms

Seems about right.

[–] milistanaccount09@hexbear.net 54 points 8 months ago (1 children)

LOL FEMTANYL... true femtanyl fans know that if the soviet union didnt collapse she would never produce girl hell 1999....

[–] hello_hello@hexbear.net 43 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (2 children)

This is ugly as shit, I take great offense to the idea that soviets would be using windows 95 instead of patching KDE2 under FreeBSD.

[–] Maoo@hexbear.net 24 points 8 months ago (3 children)

Soviets would have something like BeOS

[–] Cysioland@lemmygrad.ml 25 points 8 months ago (3 children)

DPRK is running its own Linux distro, so maybe Soviets would do something similar.

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[–] hello_hello@hexbear.net 19 points 8 months ago

HaikuOS would be called Gogol and there would be libs acting like the Soviets are just copying america like they're doing with literally every Chinese IT service/project.

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago

Somehow an atheist version of TempleOS

[–] silent_water@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago

why would they use something that doesn't give the finger to capitalists - ie the GPL. look at them mald every time the license comes up. every corporation I've ever worked at either sweats bullets when the GPL comes up or legal just bans it.

[–] Frank@hexbear.net 38 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I have a years long running joke about how the soviet i-phone would be a huge brick with all parts user serviceable in the field, terrible ergo, but it'd get five bars on the dark side of the moon.

[–] Meh@hexbear.net 32 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

Given that modern phones are already giving me RSIs, fuck it, brick phone let's go

[–] Tabitha@hexbear.net 36 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I'm confused about what this saying, is it about warcrime waifus but with Soviet aesthetics, or are they saying Windows and computers in general wouldn't have changed to be so bloated and anti-user, or...?

I would have liked to have known what having active Soviets in the 1995-2015 era of early internet social media and forums would have been like. I feel like we're suppose to be getting that experience from China soon, but hasn't really manifested yet.

Most people know about the Eternal September, basically when AOL flooded the internet with so many new users the old members were pissed off about it. You could say the 2010+ era of Android and iPhone was another Eternal September. The presence of most average americans on the internet is the key that made most exploitative practices viable from IRL to follow them into the internet. A lot of us recognize the enshitification of the recent internet.

I'm looking forward to when China and/or 3rd world give us a 3rd Eternal September. Interesting to see the United States make their own Great Firewall (starting with tiktok?) and finding new ways to suppress poorpinions (e.g. Twitter Blue). I wonder if the US will succeed in preventing the 3rd Eternal September? It's great to see that US-style free speech and US-style Democracy was all a farce. So much uncertainty for the next decade.

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 27 points 8 months ago (3 children)

I'm confused about what this saying, is it about warcrime waifus but with Soviet aesthetics, or are they saying Windows and computers in general wouldn't have changed to be so bloated and anti-user, or...?

Pretty sure it’s implying that if the Soviets won the Cold War, technological innovation would’ve been so limited by ebul socialist interference in the market that we’d only reach the late 90’s level of computer “advancement” in our timeline in the 2020’s in the Soviet timeline.

[–] iridaniotter@hexbear.net 34 points 8 months ago

I think they just like 90s aesthetic and anime and put it in their project.

[–] Tunnelvision@hexbear.net 24 points 8 months ago (4 children)

Unironically objectively better.

[–] Frank@hexbear.net 15 points 8 months ago

Right? I don't see any ads in this picture.

[–] Cysioland@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 8 months ago

The only issue I see is that right now, by shit being provided by websites we get Linux support for free. If we were forced to run standalone exes for things it might be a little worse on that front

[–] Greenleaf@hexbear.net 10 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I’m old enough to have used Windows 95. I think if people could go back and try it out they’d realize how very little operating systems have changed in 30 years.

[–] PKMKII@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago

Yeah the big improvement in desktop computers and laptops in the last ~20 years has been hardware: more ram, more storage, better displays faster chips, better connections. The commercial OS’s the last twenty years have had more patronizing enshittification than true improvements.

[–] Tabitha@hexbear.net 24 points 8 months ago

Ah yes, "progress" is when you have to learn microsoft's new single-platform GUI toolkit every 5 years, and the latest one is just a website pretending to be an application.

[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 30 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

2024: General Secretary Vlodymyr "Ringo Starr" Lenin (no relations) announces the launch of a new cryptocurrency, Khrushchev Koin, in honor of the fourth leader of the USSR and his secret speech announcing his crush for former leader Joseph Stalin.

[–] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 21 points 8 months ago

Wow, Mao was right. The USSR were revisionists!

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 29 points 8 months ago (2 children)

me malding at the people here thinking it's Windows 95 when it's obviously Windows 2000

[–] TrudeauCastroson@hexbear.net 20 points 8 months ago

Did windows 2000 even have much market penetration for home users?

It was more related to server versions of Windows than home versions, you were supposed to using ME.

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[–] AFineWayToDie@hexbear.net 27 points 8 months ago (3 children)

I love the Windows 95 aesthetic. Yeah, it looks old and janky. But you KNOW it works and won't pull some bullshit update on you or harvest your data.

[–] PorkrollPosadist@hexbear.net 45 points 8 months ago (2 children)

But you KNOW it works

:wut:

[–] flan@hexbear.net 40 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) (1 children)

haha zoomers think windows 95 worked

but maybe this is windows 2000 that actually did work pretty well.

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 22 points 8 months ago

It's Windows 2000. The recycle bin is a dead giveaway since Windows 95/98's recycle bin is more angular.

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[–] AnarchoTankie@hexbear.net 18 points 8 months ago

Windows 7 was the last good windows. Windows XP was probably the best, but I guess I like 7's aesthetics a tiny bit more. Under Micro$oft's totalitarian Windows XP regime, I always disabled what I called Fisher Price Mode, which means that I used the Windows 95/98/2000 theme instead of the default theme that made the computer UI look like it was designed for toddlers.

[–] D61@hexbear.net 12 points 8 months ago
[–] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 17 points 8 months ago

My Alt History is what modern Bluegrass would be like if Don Reno never got drafted in WWII.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 17 points 8 months ago (4 children)

What's wrong with this? Win 95 owns.

[–] JohnBrownNote@hexbear.net 13 points 8 months ago (1 children)

nobody who ever used windows 95 would say that! get him!

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 9 points 8 months ago

Windows 95 sucked even back then but got a pass because "it completely changed the paradigm by introducing the desktop metaphor to a broad audience." Most people in the know stuck with Windows 3.1, and people only jumped ship with Windows 98.

[–] Tankiedesantski@hexbear.net 7 points 8 months ago

I admit that Win 95 is nostalgic, but if I had to use it again on my home computer I'd seriously consider giving up technology and living in the woods.

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[–] ComradeChairmanKGB@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 8 months ago

It's ~~alt~~history, except I'm a cute girl and the cracker states collapsed instead of the USSR.

Ah what a world that would be.

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