chat

She's really been using her Jewish heritage more than ever now that Israel is murdering children.

This seems very concerning.

I was in a remarkably similar situation during one of Israel's offensives in the 2010s. The sense of ethnic identity, in the absence of a commitment to internationalism, can be overwhelming. You might be able to salvage this but she needs to have enough conversations with anti-Zionist Jews.

It can't just come from you. She must talk to a Jew. Better not one but a few. Simply none else will do.

If anything, ask her who on the left is saying she's going to hell?

Because I assume you aren't telling her that

I had the opposite thing where the second the horrors started ramping up again (also in 2021) I felt like I needed to do my part in promoting a social/cultural 'out' from Zionism for Jews in my community who've been raised on it. Like, try to help further mainstream a Judaism that regards Zionism as fundamentally disgusting, so other conscientious Jews can pull the escape hatch more easily. The indoctrination runs deep and the rot even deeper in my experience, entire Jewish organizations that present otherwise innocuously are built primarily to promote and rationalize the existence of Israel. Shit sucks and it suckers in libs hard because it's so baked into the institutions. I've personally helped steward along dozens of people in that process, especially at my former summer camp, and one of those people is very actively helping in facilitating organization on the ground for Palestine, which is very much an honor.

I want to further embrace my own Jewish heritage in order to promote to other Jews that it's fine to be Jewish whilst disavowing this Hitlerian statecraft project that leeches onto Jewish identity. There's a chunk of other non-religious Jews want to further embrace theirs to snuff out uncomfortable feelings they refuse to reckon with, which I reckon she kinda falls into from what you are saying.

Why on earth are you dating white libs?

I guess you could emphasize the 'I'm dating a hot witch' thing and push her that way, but, like, genocide bad, please dont ruin witchy stuff, and there are other girls out there who dont support genicide.

Edit: some even have houses and space for cats

I don't think this is restricted to white women - see the EDC people (I'm assuming mostly white men) who have 20 knives instead of a personality

We doing inframaterialism now.

and you do not do the 613 mitzvot, then you are not a follower of that religion

Apparently Mitzvot 18 is "Do not oppress the weak." so there we go, right off the bat, the existence of pissrael itself is heresy according to Judaism.

let alone your own politics

I hadn't thought about it in a long time how established I am in my politics. There's a lot I could stand to be more educated on, but I pretty much have the fundamentals down cause I don't want to be beholden to a system whose only purpose is to make sure 17 or so people are wealthy beyond measure.

indoor or outdoor?

If she sees this comment though... might speed the process up

Excellent 5D chess move

But on a more serious note, this sounds like an infinite fountain of resentment for the two of you. From the outsider POV here, it's easy to say "just leave." But as someone on the outside who has been on the inside... you gotta take action. Now or later, this stuff tends to explode.

Results will be a quick burn end of the relationship or she comes to acknowledge the truth (that criticism of Israel doesn't inherently have anything at all to do with Jewish people. And also thinking it does is into itself pretty antisemitic even if tons of people think it anyway). You either save yourself years of internal torment and resentment (and probably same on her end, to be fair) or you have a healthier, more mature relationship where you can respect each other and learn and grow together.

It's your life ultimately. Why spend it with a hovering cloud of resentment over your main relationship and source of human contact? Unless it genuinely doesn't bother you. Then do whatever. Do whatever anyway. It seems to bother you though considering draws circle this whole-ass post.

And the sunk cost fallacy is a bad logical fallacy with investments and such. When using it regarding a relationship... it's only going to get more "sunk." More cats, maybe kids, who knows. I don't want to boil relationships down to dollars, but it's safe to say long term committed relationships don't tend to have partners become less "bought-in" over time.

good luck...

common law partner bad

Steal the cats, ~~burn down the house for insurance money~~?

If you love this person and want to stay with them you have 2 options. Either you ignore this and try to not let it bother you, or you talk it out, and try to educate them. If they love you back they should be willing to listen to reason.

I will say tho. If you arent happy now are you gonna be happy in 5 more years? When millions more are dead and she supports it? What about in 10 when she wants to go on vacation in Gaza and stay in a beach house built on top of child bones? How much are you willing to put up with?