the_dunk_tank

Walking around, stabbing my pocketknife into nearby pipes to get water when I get thirsty

TIL carrying things is a feminine trait. Bad news for the moving industry

"Dad, I'm thirsty!"

"Not to worry, I've got my pocketknife! Now all we need is to find a cactus...Ooh, or one of those vines like in Predator"

men is it gay to take a thing from one location to another

Hydration is very gay. Tell me you don't feel like immediately sucking on a big pocket rocket after a few sips of h2o.

Every gay guy I've ever known drinks water regularly, so yeah, it might be

Pocketknife

Airport

🤨

Comrades I don't think we should all be taking the bait so hard

This can't be a real person

The only things men should be carrying around are his wallet and a pocket knife.

Real men leave their houses unlocked, don't have a car, and don't even own a cell phone.

This guy in the 1800s showing up to the HMS Terror to go find the Northwest Passage armed only with a pocket knife and nothing else, trying to explain to the crew that carrying things is feminine and gay actually

No car keys! Car keys make you gay!

Men should be carrying around a wallet and a pocket knife.

Look at this aristocratic dandy. Paying for things and using tools. Did all his teeth fall out or something?

Every gay person I know drinks water, so yeah seems preeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty gay.

This is clearly reverse psychology meant to trick men into dying of dehydration.

Staying hydrated while being blasted with dry recycled air and surrounded by thousands of people with unique bacteria and virus biomes: very feminine.

imagine carrying a pocket knife around lmao

Yes, it is!

Fellas, is it gay to not die of thirst especially when at an airport?

carrying shit is feminine

That's a new take.

ah yes, the airport. famously a place that is cool with concealed knives.

the worst are the wives/gf who say their partners changing the diapers/ playing with their kids gave them the ick.

feminine trait

Unless you're constantly burning rubber in a parking lot doing figure-eights in a suburban assault vehicle while guzzling Monster(tm) to wash down that Baconator(tm) you're not masculine enough! Keep up!

Wallets are extremely, wildly gay, the only option for the true alpha male is Burlap Sack of Coins

I dunno how if this trick works in other airports, but at Portland's airport you can fill your hydroflask with beer at the bars inside the terminal. PDX has anti price gouging rules too, so the business's can't sell things for more than $1 over their menu prices outside of the airport.

The only thing men should carry is a 5 inch pocket knife, a Bad Motherfucker Wallet, a huge keychain with a bottle opener and multitool and unapproved Tritium illunimated vial, and a powerful metal flashlight, and a solid metal pen with a gimmick way of opening it, and a little notebook that says "Field Notes" on the cover, and the cover is the same color as the scales on the pocket knife. and a polymer frame Subcompact pistol, and $300 Seiko watch, and a zippo lighter, and a little metal fidget toy or lucid dreaming token, and a leatherman, and a small canvas pouch, and a Sony Xperia I V, and a super old, kind of shitty, really skinny pocket knife, and a titanium ridgewallet, and a Casio calculator watch.

real men have wives that carry all their stuff for them like mules, and then make fun of their wives for having such large purses.

Swallowing any liquids is effeminate. Men just go until they're hospitalized and need to be intravenously hydrated.