this post was submitted on 30 Dec 2024
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Here's to a new year! Here's my first mega try (also first time posting in a while due to reasons) but heya! Admittedly struggled a fair bit with self doubt and anxiety on this one as put it off for a while/other things caught up with me but I figure I'll be glad I did it once I've done it. It's kinda being done last minute though, so admittedly there's that...

I'd been intending to make the mega about something else originally when I signed up, but that would require more time on my part (and I just binge read this recently, so it all works out). Anyways, my subject of the week is The Summer Hikaru Died; it's a queer (BL) horror manga which is currently also scheduled for anime release next year (2025).

Content warnings naturally follow and further details will be spoilered.

CONTENT WARNINGSGrief, body horror and (very debatably IMO) mild gore, supernatural horror (ghosts/"impurities", otherworldly entities), death I suppose though that one's a given

PremiseThe titular Hikaru went for a walk in the woods, died, and something came back wearing his body, something that doesn't quite know how to be human or mortal; "Hikaru" returned, to ensure that his best friend, Yoshiki, would not be lonely. Romantic tension (and tension of a less pleasant kind) ensues.

The plot/things I like about it thus far (light spoilers)Yoshiki and "Hikaru" have an absolutely great dynamic- their relationship may not be fully healthy, but their intentions seem to both be in the right place, as are their deep feelings (Yoshiki's for Hikaru and increasingly for "Hikaru," and Hikaru and "Hikaru's" own true feelings) and honesty in this regard, despite the latter "Hikaru" being effectively an imposter of sorts. (it's complicated, but these are increasingly distinguished separately and I really like that process as well)

"Hikaru" is, while not quite a blank slate, extremely new to the concept of even just "being" in the sense that mortal creatures and individual organisms(?) do. They've had to learn (and Yoshiki has had to confront them about) the value and significance of life and death; they've increasingly established boundaries, and they approach the world with a liveliness and curiousity that is really cute (the original Hikaru was also lively FWIW, but "Hikaru" is experiencing everything anew even if they retain the memories).

Yoshiki, on the other hand, is both grappling with his grief and loss of Hikaru, while finding comfort (and discomfort alike) in his imposter, and in guiding them through a new world or state of being. He's finding his resolve and moral/ethical backbone interacting with "Hikaru" (very blue-and-orange morality dynamics, though they're learning), he's experiencing what could be described as a rocky but determined romance and queer experimentation at the same time "Hikaru" is being introduced to notions of attraction and desire (beyond instinctual desire to consume).

Their pairing in so many ways should not work (or rather would be usually destined for a tragic end). From the start, there have been several points where by all means it should have met such an end. But their determination and willingness to meet the other where they're at and gradually be understanding with the other is both fascinating and something I'd feel optimistic for (and interested in seeing play out further).

Anyways, I should cut myself short at this (and make sure to have something properly written beforehand for next time). But anyways, thus far it's a strong recommend (if you feel alright with the content warnings) from me.


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[–] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago

People say to dress for your body type…but that requires me to analyze my body, so no thank you doggirl-sleep

The other day, my friend apologized for accidentally touching my tit (he actually didn't; just touched the pillow next to it). I'm not out to him exactly, but he's also sorta been asking if I'm a girl for like 2 years now (including indirectly earlier that day). Maybe I should give a fuller answer than a very non-convincing "no" while looking away embarrassedly.

Anyways, rare cis person not being clueless? Kinda surprised because he tends to be a misogynistic and such. Sorta wonder if he just wants me to be a girl just because that would make him less gay.

[–] Josephine_Spiro@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (5 children)

MODS???? I SPILLED MY TRANGENDERIZING JUICE. ANYONE IN CONTACT WILL BE TURNED INTO AN ANTHROPOMORPHIC HUMAN. PLESSE VACATE THE AREA. I REPEAT VACATE THE AREA

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[–] ashinadash@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (3 children)

If I read yuri manga, I will hate myself less. Yuri manga is the cure.

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[–] Tommasi@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (3 children)

scary!imagine being a cishet scared

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[–] bubbalu@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

[volcel-police]

DynamicI am now in a dynamic play relationship with another subby switch. We each set goals for the week and the loser has to dom. We have incredible chemistry so it is intensely motivating.

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[–] Wendy_Pleakley@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago

committed to having a better handle on my emotions in 2025

it's been a very relaxing week minus battling the sniffles. just doing my own thing

[–] SuperZutsuki@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Happy new year! May all your gender goals come closer to fruition and all transphobes meet a grisly end.

[–] BountifulEggnog@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago

timmy-pray death to transphobes

[–] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)

My wife abandoned me to play Dark Souls doggirl-gloom

[–] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago (4 children)

dysphoriaSometimes I feel so wide! doggirl-tears
I feel like I’d be narrower at my height if I was cis.

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[–] Eco@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago

got regifted some expensive whisky and it's yummy

[–] MoonElf@hexbear.net 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (6 children)

Witchy stuff

Today is a special day for some witches. It's a Dark Moon, and the last new moon of the year, and falling on the 30th one of Hecate's special days in the Hellenistic tradition. This lineup won't reoccur for many years, I may never see it again.

And last night i slept amazingly for the first night in a month and my mother in law is properly and intentionally using my gf's pronouns just out of the blue after 5 months of insisting she never would. There's magic in the air!!!! Less than 2 hours until the moon's zenith for me. I'm so happy! Time for Deipnon!!

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[–] Eco@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago

i'm sure there's still an original concept to be found in the "mascot horror" genre. maybe another few thousand games and we'll get it

[–] Seryph@lemmygrad.ml 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Gotta love being hit by my usual late night emotionalness right when I'm about to sleep so I can't sleep and then get even more emotional about not being able to sleep

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[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

finally got around to blocking c/doomer but god dammit any hope i had in me of tonight getting better is gone. everything fucking sucks again and i only feel pain. i got misgendered more times than i could count at work today after putting all this effort into my voice and now i have to desperately try not to buy another bottle of piss cheap vodka about it

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[–] Eco@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago

i went library :)

books

[–] Thallo@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] SadArtemis@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

Heya ☺️ catgirl-salute

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Found the vaporwave theme on hexbear, I'm now reading y'alls comments with that filter now kirby-wave

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[–] President_Obama@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (9 children)

Y'all know about nullos? You should

Nullification is a type of SRS where the genitals are removed, and the genital area is completely flat/smooth, with only a small hole for the urethra left. The procedure is done by a few clinics in the USA and Mexico. People who have had the procedure or want it, refer to themselves as nullos.

There's three main motivations for getting it, in my anecdotal experience talking with other nullos: first is obviously gender dysphoria. I'm agender, and so are most nullos.

A second is asexuality: some want their bodies to reflect their sexuality, and for some it's a combination of gender and sexuality that makes them feel more comfortable having a body without genitals.

A third, smaller but still significant portion of nullos are cis gay men, bottoms, who from as far as I can tell desire it as expression of their sexuality.

I'm in a small community online (OK, a discord server, lol) of nullos, and it's a genuine 50/50 split between "I'm ace never want to do anything remotely sexual" and the most wildly kinky people I've ever fucking met. Also the most accepting people I've ever met.

Small note, there's some overlap with people with BIID? Which is interesting

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[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (1 children)

my bi cycle has been so completely and utterly out of wack recently and it's been exhausting. Yesterday I was daydreaming all day about boys without a single thought about women and three days before that I was doing the exact opposite!! Every day I internally roll a d6 and that's where I am on the fucking Kinsey scale for the day and I really wish it wasn't so volatile. Let me pick a side and stay with it for at least 2 weeks or do before moving on angry-hex

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[–] anonochronomus@hexbear.net 15 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Hello my lovelies! It's been a MINUTE since my last post, and I have been SO DAMN BUSY. All good things, though. So I guess it's STORY TIME, short story long;

I got sober in September. For real this time. I used to smoke crack and shoot dope. I haven't done that in over two years but I just COULD NOT SHAKE alcohol. I'm a genetic alcoholic, big time. What that means is my brain makes its own opiates when I drink. So when I drink, I don't want to get fucked up. I just want a sip. It took me a long time to figure that out. 10 years actually, it's been 10 years since my first interaction with addiction treatment and I finally got it. Feels pretty good.

Anyhow, since my judgement wasn't clouded for the first time in my life, I was able to honestly evaluate my relationship with my family and HOLY SHIT ARE THEY SICK. Both parents and two sisters check ALL THE BOXES for Narcissistic Personality Disorder. They're FUCKED UP PIECES OF SHIT. Thats what us in AA like to call a miracle. I was able to see something that I was blind to my entire life. No one could have showed it to me but God. Anyhow, I called the pigs on them and reported them as domestic abusers and got my skinny bitch ass outta there so eat shit fuckers.

I'm back in the city, the most radical neighborhood in Amerikkka (if you know you know) amongst my people! THE QUEERS AND COMMIES sicko-fem

I took a Shahada so I'm officially a Muslim now. It's so cool. The dudes who run the smoke shops in my neighborhood are Houthi, so I've been hanging with them and they're COOL AS FUCK. Real recognizes real.

Oh yeah, last thing; I found out my Grandfather was involved in Real IRA activities during the troubles. I don't know EXACTLY what he did, but I'm pretty sure he was INSTRUMENTAL in getting arms back to the old country during the Troubles. He got out of the life around the time I was born, and my name was changed after the Good Friday agreement to keep the feds off my back. My birth name is as Irish Republican as it gets- I cant tell you what it is for opsec reasons but I can tell you what it means, and if you want to do the research to figure it out that's on you;

I AM THE FIRST MARTYR FROM THE BOG.

How about that? I'm REAL IRA. Nothing provisional about me, boyo. I'm the real thing. The realist. They know my name in Dublin and Belfast, all along the falls road and on the road to Al Quds. I'm a Martyr just like my ancestors. I was BORN to bring death to Amerikkka, MASHALLAH.

I love every single one of you SO FUCKIN MUCH!!! This is a really special place, and I'm so glad y'all were here when I needed you.

Love and Solidarity,

Alice D. heart-sickle

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[–] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

Shower fixed doggirl-happy

[–] Eco@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

puppy new yuri

[–] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Found a Super Jammie Dodger at the Super Tesco doggirl-happy

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[–] JohnBrownsBussy2@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (2 children)

CW: Health stuff that I need to vent about.Fucking hemorrhoids are acting up again, more blood in the stool that I am comfortable with and a fair amount of pain. Because I am (temporarily) between jobs, my health insurance doesn't kick in until next week, so I can't schedule a check-in. I am also loathe to interact with the "normal" medical system post starting HRT.

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[–] 0x2640@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)
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[–] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Did some real cringe shit at the gym and feel very retroactively embarrassed but like nobody saw so I guess it's okay but I'm actually worried about the employees watching the CCTV and being like "damn, what a (SLUR redacted-1redacted-2)

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[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Oh yeah, it's artie's turn for the mega catgirl-heart

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[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

Not first, sucks.

[–] rtstragedy@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I am sicki lost so much of my vacation to food poisoning and I am pissed about it, I still can't eat properly, I have put so many important things off

[–] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (9 children)

Mother in-law gifted me a mug for Christmas, might have to become a tea drinker. doggirl-shock
What is good tea even tho? lea-think

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[–] Eco@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)

i abandoned my wife to play dark souls

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[–] yewler@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (5 children)

I'm around such yappers and I can never get a word in edgewise and all of a sudden when I start infodumping I get shut down basically instantly. Why am I even here?

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[–] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Probapoly: the feeling of when you're probably polyamorus but have no romantic partners and no idea if you'd actually be into it if you had a single, monogamous relationship

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[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 14 points 1 week ago

Spin class but we all bring out our beyblades kirby-spin

[–] Wmill@hexbear.net 13 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Cashier: Any bags?

Me: no I got a good night's sleep gigachad

Then the cashier gave me a weak chuckle.

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