this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2023
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chapotraphouse

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Unsurprisingly the Muskrat lied about everything else too wojak-nooo

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[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 39 points 11 months ago (3 children)

That’s reserved for the prememium model

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 12 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I can imagine a couple guys in Tesla's marketing department talking about it.

"Elon's putting out a premium model at $69,420."

"That sounds about right for his middle school mindset."

"It has a WeedHolder and a SexButton among other features."

"Really? Or did you make that up?"

"Yes."

[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 10 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Sex mode would be what he calls the button that lays the seats all the way back.

A built in bong would rule. Just hope the low quality assurance didn’t miss it getting contaminated with exhaust.

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

"Dude, disconnect your bong! I told you not to buy an Elon Truck!"

"What are you talking about?"

"This morning a guy in LA took a big toke and his lungs caught on fire and he died a horrible death. He was Tiktoking at the time. It went viral."

"That would be a serious quality control issue if in fact—"

"It sounds to me that you need to be deprogrammed."

[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 4 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Inb4 Elon creates a combustion model to deflect the narrative, the carb is located in the gas tank so you’re getting extra diesel while you smoke that diesel cuz we heard you liked diesel, dawg.

[–] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)
[–] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Fun can come in surprising ways. Select your preferred fart style and target seat. Use your turn signal or press the left scroll wheel when you’re ready to “release” your prank. For those lucky vehicles equipped with a Pedestrian Warning System, you can choose to broadcast externally when your vehicle is parked. But wait-- the fun doesn't stop there! Use the mobile app to conduct remote emissions testing by touching and holding any of the four quick control buttons and selecting the fart button.

God fucking damn it.

[–] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago

This is from the mind of a 50 year old who many consider some kind of supergenius.

[–] the_post_of_tom_joad@hexbear.net 5 points 11 months ago

So it has a virtual whoopie cushion under each seat. I don't even know anymore, man. I'm going to bed

[–] InevitableSwing@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I wonder what percentage of Tesla drivers follow this warning.

Warning

Use these features only when Model X is parked. Always pay attention to road and traffic conditions when driving. Using these features while driving is illegal and very dangerous.

[–] BelieveRevolt@hexbear.net 8 points 11 months ago

anakin-padme-2 Surely they don't work when you're driving?

anakin-padme-3

[–] the_post_of_tom_joad@hexbear.net 9 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Did you just invent 'meme-ium'?

[–] GinAndJuche@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago

I can’t have been the first to add two letters to premium lol. Too many keyboards being smashed away at.