this post was submitted on 11 Jan 2025
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chapotraphouse

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Haven't you ever think, hmm isn't it a little weird seeing a guy named "Mr. Beast" going around healing the blind, giving money away to poor people? Not to mention his public aspirations to become the president. Everybody is saying he speaks in demonic tongues when not in public. He whispers to himself "lord Satan, i serve you, i am at your command" under his breath, many say. According to my sources, he has a secret channel on YouTube which is only visible when you type in "666 HAIL SATAN" into the search bar. There's a video on the channel where he seasons babies and then fries them, creating some sort of KFC analogue, then eats the fried babies while speaking in demonic tongues, eyes rolled back into his head.

This guy is the fucking antichrist, there is no denying it. I will not be silenced by the Beast.

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[–] LaughingLion@hexbear.net 7 points 3 hours ago

more and more people are saying this

god bless amen

[–] Thallo@hexbear.net 5 points 3 hours ago

There's a video on the channel where he seasons babies and then fries them, creating some sort of KFC analogue, then eats the fried babies

Mr. Beast practices Gonzalo thought?

[–] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 10 points 5 hours ago* (last edited 5 hours ago)

No no Mr Beast is the Beast. V*ush is the Antichrist who leads the faithful astray. None of you have read theory.

[–] queermunist@lemmy.ml 2 points 3 hours ago* (last edited 3 hours ago)

You need to brush up on your lore! He's clearly the second beast that arises from the abyss, the one that performs great signs and causes all the earth and those who dwell in it to worship the Antichrist. He's the False Prophet. Why else have a YouTube channel?

[–] Cimbazarov@hexbear.net 1 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

The Antichrist is supposed to cure the blind?

So does that mean the Mahdi and Jesus are also alive and will kill him?

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 3 points 4 hours ago

If the world ends because of some guy named "Jimmy" the world deserves to end.

Was the band Jimmy Eat World prophetically named? Were we warned?

[–] miz@hexbear.net 30 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

full name? Mark Ofthe Beast

[–] Spike@hexbear.net 8 points 6 hours ago

If only his first name actually was Mark, conspiracy theorists would go wild and non zero chance he'd be shot

[–] TheLepidopterists@hexbear.net 35 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago) (3 children)

I don't even believe in the concept of the antichrist but I think it's undeniable that Mr Beast is the antichrist.

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 8 points 6 hours ago

If there was one it would be him

[–] corgiwithalaptop@hexbear.net 8 points 6 hours ago

@admins new site tagline pls

[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 14 points 7 hours ago

Ok this is my take now

[–] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 6 points 5 hours ago

KFC analogue

Kentucky Fried Children

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 11 points 6 hours ago

Unironically, we should spread this rumor

Let the honkeys have at each other

[–] 9to5@hexbear.net 20 points 8 hours ago* (last edited 8 hours ago) (1 children)

I HOPE he is the Antichrist. Would be fitting for the Antichrist to become the President of the US

[–] Xiisadaddy@lemmygrad.ml 16 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Kentucky Fried Children are the most popular snack in AmeriKKKa.

[–] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 5 points 5 hours ago

ah dammit you made the comment before I did

[–] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 14 points 7 hours ago

two-wolves-1 Inside you there are two Christs. two-wolves-2

[–] Acute_Engles@hexbear.net 18 points 8 hours ago

What if the Antichrist was just the YouTube videos we watched along the way?

[–] TheDrink@hexbear.net 2 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

I Mr Beast was doing a video called "Giving $1000 to everyone who gets a Beast Tattoo" would you go get that bag? The tattoo wouldn't have to be in a prominent place on your body, just somewhere.

[–] fox@hexbear.net 2 points 4 hours ago

Some dude got free Pepsi for a lifetime by tattooing the logo on himself unprompted iirc. A thou for a tattoo isn't gonna cut the mustard