51

Look at him smoking cigarettes, guy knows what he's doing

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[-] supafuzz@hexbear.net 42 points 9 months ago

Dinner, the movie rights alone for my subsequently ghostwritten My Dinner with Jong Un book will go for more than $500k

[-] Zvyozdochka@hexbear.net 29 points 9 months ago

I'll take the dinner offer and then ask to stay forever.

ARTICLE 26. The D.P.R.K. affords the right of asylum to foreign nationals persecuted for fighting for democratic principles or national liberation movements, or for the interests of the working people or for freedom of scientific and cultural activities.

[-] JohnBrownNote@hexbear.net 15 points 9 months ago

i don't think posting counts

[-] WithoutFurtherBelay@hexbear.net 12 points 9 months ago

They’ll just do some adventure-time beforehand!

[-] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

While I think it wouldn't be very useful, there are probably some protest-oriented things you could do that aren't adventurism or even violent that would get the attention of a western state and function as a workable pretext for this purpose

[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 28 points 9 months ago

Dinner with him so we can laugh at the memes I have about Fail Korea on my phone.

[-] anarchoilluminati@hexbear.net 9 points 9 months ago

He'd probably already know them.

I have a feeling like he could be a top poster on Hexbear.

[-] silent_water@hexbear.net 3 points 9 months ago

obv we recruit him as a power poster at the dinner with sick ass memes

[-] Great_Leader_Is_Dead@hexbear.net 24 points 9 months ago

$500k, wtf do I have to say to Kim? What would he have to say to me? I like Korean food but I can get great as Korean food like ten miles from my house.

$500k on the other hand would fix most of me and my families problems for a while, maybe even leave me with a little to throw at some leftist org.

[-] Ho_Chi_Chungus@hexbear.net 18 points 9 months ago

$500k, wtf do I have to say to Kim? What would he have to say to me?

Me: "So uhhh, how is it being the head of state?

Kim: "이 사람이 무슨 말을 하는지 전혀 모르겠습니다."

[-] Great_Leader_Is_Dead@hexbear.net 27 points 9 months ago

"Kim, please help me settle this struggle session on a niche communist internet forum I post on! We very much respect your opinion!"

"Outdoor cats? What the fuck does this have to do with communism?"

[-] zifnab25@hexbear.net 22 points 9 months ago

Money is temporary but quality Korean food lives inside me forever.

[-] KittyBobo@hexbear.net 21 points 9 months ago

Money can buy many Korean food.

[-] zifnab25@hexbear.net 24 points 9 months ago

Dinner with Kim cannot be commoditized by your worthless fiat dollars. The spirit of communism is too strong.

[-] LarsAdultsen@hexbear.net 4 points 9 months ago

I think a laxative may be in order

[-] abc@hexbear.net 21 points 9 months ago

You're all fools for taking the 500k.

I take the dinner with Kim and I ask him if we can take a photo (or photos) together that I can show the dogs of the American empire upon my return. Hopefully he consents.

I then log onto Twitter and post the pic with the caption "Great dinner with President Kim tonight! The US could learn a lot from a leader like him!" and wait for the underpaid CNN/MSNBC/Fox/etc interns to hit my DMs like "Hello ABC can we speak to you about your dinner with Secretary Kim?"

I only appear on networks/talk shows/etc that agree to pay my $10,000 appearance fees. I am set for life being the guy they bring on the network as the 'NK Expert' anytime North Korea's in the news. I only say good things about Kim.

smuglord

[-] ImmortanStalin@lemmygrad.ml 3 points 9 months ago

You gotta end every interview with a cliffhanger. Just casually drop "and yeah, their teleportation tech is really catching up. They can beam rabbits now."

[-] Maoo@hexbear.net 2 points 9 months ago

"The ABCs of The Hermit Kingdom with abc"

[-] AcidMarxist@hexbear.net 14 points 9 months ago

I dont speak Korean, so maybe the 500k. But I could also flip a meeting with KJU into 500k, cuz im just built different

[-] Hello_Kitty_enjoyer@hexbear.net 13 points 9 months ago

$500k and then use it to get to North Korea or Dongbei and then be their version of Yeonmi Park (except actually accurate)

[-] Blep@hexbear.net 11 points 9 months ago
[-] Frank@hexbear.net 11 points 9 months ago

500k. I don't speak Korean.

Actually, with 500k I coould get a ticket to Korea and invite Jong Un to dinner or something. Who knows, maybe he'd say yes, idk what the guy's schedule is like.

[-] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 6 points 9 months ago

I'm sure he speaks English. If anything his Kino dad showed him some movies.

[-] barrbaric@hexbear.net 8 points 9 months ago

Went to private school which was taught in english despite being in switzerland.

[-] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago

He's a world leader that has to deal with the west all the damn time and also his dad and grandfather were also that guy, it would be weird if he didn't know English, but also a total Chad move

[-] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 3 points 9 months ago

I think his Kino dad was more interested in Korean/Cantonese/Russian/German-language films than the English-language ones.

[-] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 4 points 9 months ago

He's also the son and grandson of world leaders who have been in constant diplomatic conflict with English speaking countries. I'm sure they've picked some up here and there.

[-] odmroz@hexbear.net 10 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Dinner. He will find me incredibly charming and will let me stay in NK and talk shit about America, like a reverse Yeonmi Park.

[-] hexaflexagonbear@hexbear.net 10 points 9 months ago

$500k, I could use that as a condo downpayment!

[-] Mokey@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago
[-] D61@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago

Cash is king baby. Nobody would care if I met Kim Jong un.

[-] GaveUp@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago

I could be a DPRK citizen and still take the 500k

[-] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 7 points 9 months ago

Can we play horse with Dennis Rodman before dinner?

[-] professionalduster@hexbear.net 6 points 9 months ago

obviously dinner with Kim, after which I would become the leader of the juche gang

[-] envis10n@hexbear.net 6 points 9 months ago

Dinner. I just wanna shoot the shit and have a cool hang.

[-] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 4 points 9 months ago

500k. I'd feel bad asking Kim for 500k to make the dinner worthwhile the whole time.

[-] Maoo@hexbear.net 3 points 9 months ago

Meeting politicians and celebs is massively overrated. $500k and immediately invest in juche necromancy.

[-] SpiderFarmer@hexbear.net 2 points 9 months ago

I'm coming home with a set of those Korean legos!

[-] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 2 points 9 months ago

I really don't get why someone in his position smokes when it's illegal in the DPRK and he's a figurehead (i.e. appearing before people is his job)

[-] robinn_IV@hexbear.net 6 points 9 months ago

It’s not wholesale illegal in the DPRK, just in public areas iirc.

[-] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 2 points 9 months ago

Sex with 18 year old Jay Z

[-] radiofreeval@hexbear.net 2 points 9 months ago

500k, I'm sure the guy's swell and all but 500k is a huge amount of money.

this post was submitted on 11 Jan 2024
51 points (100.0% liked)

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