this post was submitted on 05 Oct 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again

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[–] driving_crooner 66 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Rotate 180° and shopped it side to side with Mussolini.

[–] thelastaxolotl@hexbear.net 115 points 2 months ago (9 children)
[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 66 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Wow reported to facebook for terrorism, enjoy you're ban.

[–] thelastaxolotl@hexbear.net 61 points 2 months ago

banned by the woke police kitty-birthday-sad

[–] driving_crooner 38 points 2 months ago
[–] Belly_Beanis@hexbear.net 31 points 2 months ago

:waow-based:

[–] vegeta1@hexbear.net 25 points 2 months ago
[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

lmao I literally had this idea before scrolling down

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[–] Weedian@hexbear.net 39 points 2 months ago

Or falling into the cuck pit

[–] mustGo@hexbear.net 55 points 2 months ago (2 children)
[–] miz@hexbear.net 21 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)
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[–] ChaosMaterialist@hexbear.net 20 points 2 months ago

all the sound effects came to me unprompted. Nice work!

[–] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 52 points 2 months ago (1 children)

wtf it took me too long to figure out it was melon-musk

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 42 points 2 months ago (1 children)

He's still getting mileage out of his "OCCUPY MARS" shirt.

He's always been a piece of shit and he still thinks mocking Occupy Wall Street is quirky.

[–] FloridaBoi@hexbear.net 36 points 2 months ago (1 children)

makes sense bc his memes are all from 2013

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 28 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Le Epic X goes all the way back to the Xtreme fad of the 90s, which he simply can't let go of as a le epic letter.

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Le epic X-treme always makes me think of like early to mid 90s Xmen and Rob Lefield artwork. I cant imagine never growing from that point. Its such a specific aesthetic

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[–] adultswim_antifa@hexbear.net 50 points 2 months ago (3 children)
[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 38 points 2 months ago

Because he's the main character, the bestest boy, the very smartest, and his mommy even tweeted so just before he did that jump.

[–] pooh@hexbear.net 21 points 2 months ago

Even Trump knows he's cringe

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 20 points 2 months ago

The theory I subscribe to is he got addicted to internet clout by being offbeat and le random xD with tweens after his PewDiePie appearance.

He was content with cameos on The Big Bang Theory or Iron Man as the South African Thomas Edison (in more ways than one). Someone online redditors and tech bros know as some eccentric rocket/car maker.

But after PewDiePie, he tasted the approval of mainstream children. He was on stage with a modern celebrity tasting modern fandom. He's chased that high ever since. And the more he's chased it the more insufferable he's become to a regular person.

All that's left are people too braindead to see through his PR, who think he's an actual Tony Stark genius, and those same braindead morons are overwhelmingly right wing because once again they're too dumb to not fall for right wing talking points. And of course he's pandering to them, the only people who still like him, because affection is the only thing he can't buy.

Emerald mine money can buy him cars, a PR team, a "founder" title, degrees and a reputation as an epic inventor. But it cannot buy him affection. Not from his children, not from people with an ounce of common sense.

[–] miz@hexbear.net 50 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] KurtVonnegut@hexbear.net 32 points 2 months ago (1 children)

In this moment, Elon is euphoric. Not because of some phony woke pronouns. But because he has fully self-actualized himself by finally becoming the little fascist he has always wanted to be.

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[–] Commiejones@hexbear.net 42 points 2 months ago

I love the look on trumps face. "what the fuck is this disgusting loser doing?"

[–] roux@hexbear.net 41 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Is he still wearing those boots from when he was pretending to be a cowboy in Texas?

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 37 points 2 months ago (1 children)

And the fucking buckle.

And the "OCCUPY MARS" super dated attempt to dunk on OWS.

He's a collection of increasingly-expired "cool" attempts that no one around him dares to say otherwise about.

[–] roux@hexbear.net 33 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

As someone that bought a buckle like that just to be ironic when I moved to Texas, and as someone that is also shaped like a potato, I can garauntee that thing is digging into his soft marshmallow gut since his shirt isn't tucked in. Uncritical support for the buckle imo.

E: but yeah Melon def want's so hard to be his own action figure lol.

[–] Coca_Cola_but_Commie@hexbear.net 38 points 2 months ago

Can’t believe someone captured a photograph of the moment Elon Musk sacrificed his own life to take Trump’s third would-be assassin’s bullet. Whatever you want to say about how Musk lived his life, he died a hero.

[–] Des@hexbear.net 37 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Ozembic face. i seriously didn't recognize him

[–] ShimmeringKoi@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago

Dude became Andrew Yang

[–] stigsbandit34z@hexbear.net 33 points 2 months ago

Elon musk’s like the only incomprehensibly powerful guy who you can meme about and it actually mean something (it will offend him)

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 32 points 2 months ago

I believe I can fly

I believe my little wiener can touch the sky

500,000 of my cars burn night and day

Spread my wig and fly away~

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 27 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

The silver lining of Yankee electoral politics is that whatever happens in November, some of the most cringe-worthy and disgusting people alive are going to be so mad and sore about it.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 13 points 2 months ago

I know it's just regular MAGA vs blue MAGA, but I'll take some bittersweet satisfaction to watch my-hero eat shit with the latter outcome.

[–] Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net 27 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Looks like he lost a few pounds. Good for him I guess.

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 28 points 2 months ago (1 children)

My main focus for posting that picture is the cartoon supervillain "LOOK MOMMY! I AM THE BESTEST BOY! I WILL SHOW THEM ALL!" energy of this.

[–] Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net 18 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Yeah but he does look way less like shit then he did in those yacht photos

[–] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 29 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

Bleeding edge gender affirmation treatments keep getting better; only the best for a cishet billionaire bigot.

It's a medical arms race against him being a 50something lazy slob, though.

[–] Hexboare@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Team ketamine is also highly competitive in the arms race

[–] vegeta1@hexbear.net 24 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Richest man serving as a jester for a fascist. Both likely pedos and sex pests

[–] PolandIsAStateOfMind@lemmygrad.ml 15 points 2 months ago

Well this kinda reminds me of Goebbels assistant who was a real deal duke, and Goebbels swinged between fawning to him and treating him like disgusting lackey he was.

Not to mention all the industrialists and aristocrats licking boots of various nazi bonzos.

[–] CloutAtlas@hexbear.net 22 points 2 months ago (6 children)

This man is perpetually trying to go back to a time where he was more popular. Doge memes. Libertarians being relevant (le epic Ron Paul and Ron Swanson). Tumblr tier puns (let that sink in). 69/420 funny numbers. Occupy Wall Street. Its as if I can peer into his mind. I see a divorced man, former cool uncle, now going through a midlife crisis, desperately throwing the same memes and references to recapture his former status as "cool".

Man's gonna release a Harlem Shake video with Trump Jr. and Eric in 2024 wearing a Dicks Out For Harambe shirt.

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 16 points 2 months ago

Whenever you feel your're not good enough, not cool enough, too out of touch, too much of a dork, you just have to remember that Elon exists and immediately you'll feel better about yourself.

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[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Cut him out of this image and put him upside down.

no-fash

EDIT: I scrolled down https://hexbear.net/comment/5470461

[–] BurgerPunk@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

What the hell am i looking at?!

If he was actually an "Imperator" as he fancies himself the Preatorian Guard would have axed him and grabbed whoever was next in line to take his place

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[–] Mindfury@hexbear.net 19 points 2 months ago (1 children)

at this point, soy beans themselves are a mere simulacrum of how fucking soy this image is

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