It's the dunk tank.
This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.
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Rule 9: if you post ironic rage bait im going to make a personal visit to your house to make sure you never make this mistake again
I had high breasts, most of my eggs, plausible deniability when it came to purity, a flush ponytail, a pep in my step that had yet to run out. Apologies to Progress, but older men still desired those things.
dear god this is terrible writing and gross as well
plausible deniability when it came to purity
the fuck is this supposed to mean anyway? the she's into anal?
I read that as she saying she was young enough to plausibly claim to be a virgin
god female purity cult people are so fucking weird
"My exoskeleton has a lustrous iridescence, my pheromones are heady, and my brooding sac is engorged. My stores of fungus will last the hive through the winter, and I need to capture an experienced male to ensure the colony is strong"
somehow less gross
Right? Let me hear some more about that lustrous iridescence 
I'm glad I came in here before reading it cause this sentence alone makes me want to expel my lunch.
I know tradwives are real and gross in their own way, but God damn it really just feels like this was written by the most misogynist chatgpt excerpt in some dudes weird fetish cave.
a little sad, a little sick, and utterly banal. if i could get just one thing shy of revolution god can it be for conservatives to drop this notion of trying to play subversive when they're acting/promoting the most prototypical, ancient fucking concepts. wow you have a notion of womanhood of a victorian countess, how rebellious
this faux-revolutionary aesthetic in their rhetoric is actually a tactic to coopt the people who noticed we need big sweeping change but havent figured out the whys yet.
all so they can keep the world unchanged, but somehow different. i don't think they are dropping it, its pretty effective.
This seems to be a thing that's getting pushed at the moment, I don't quite get it but I've seen a couple of articles on young women marrying out of the workforce. Trying to drive birth rates among a certain class maybe, musk style eugenicists
I had to give up halfway through this because of how painfully bad the writing is. The most shocking part of the text is that whoever wrote this claims to have an English degree.
I feel like the trainwreck of the opening sentence just captures the vibe
In the summer, in the south of France, my husband and I like to play, rather badly, the lottery.
Beyond how God awful the structure and pacing are, what is this content? It takes her like a hundred words and almost as many commas to say 'I won the lottery when I met my partner'.
what the fuck is that sentence?? this is beats the worst i have writen. its so bad, i could hardly beat that if i tried...
The one quoted in the comment @disposable_cracker@hexbear.net found is even better. I didn't make it that far, this shit's unparseable for me.
I dream of new structures, a world in which women have entry-level jobs in their 30s; alternate avenues for promotion; corporate ladders with balconies on which they can stand still, have a smoke, take a break, make a baby, enjoy themselves, before they keep climbing.
I dream of whole new sentences but here we are.
That is entirely too fucking many semi-colons that still props up the mother of all run-ons! Like, I know I'm guilty of semi-colon abuse sometimes; but this is beyond the fucking pale
this is so bad that it gives me motivation to actually write. Like i am so much better at writing then this person.
She's using the corporate ladder metaphor to say that she wants to party and make babies without harming her career. It's confusing how she says she wants a ladder with a balcony but eh
Oh I get what she's getting at, worth also noting that it's so myopic it starts with a clear personal grievance. I don't think "entry-level jobs in their 30s" is even a top-50 goal for feminists wrt gender equity in the work place. The balcony thing is hamfisted too.
The problem is she wants this stilted style, a bunch of commas; maybe a semi-colon to make sure a list is split up in a way that lets you easily discern items. When if you really wanted to lean into the ladder vibe and write in a weird way it's clearly a spot for line breaks:
I dream of new structures:
a world in which women have entry-level jobs in their 30s;
alternate avenues for promotion;
corporate ladders with balconies on which they can stand still, have a smoke, take a break, make a baby, enjoy themselves,
before they keep climbing.
Yeah she could use an editor. But I've also known people who talk exactly like that so is it really bad writing if it perfectly captures the mind of the author, clunkiness and all?
lol that's an interesting lens. in this case yes because idgaf about the author's banal bourgeois rationalization of their conservatism, and the fact they captured it more authentically just heightens that disgust
Good writing - is when punctuation; the more punctuation, the gooder writing it is.
a bunch of people on Tictok are praising the prose, and saying that shes wrong but is a great writer. i felt like I was losing it and had to post here.
lmao those people have shit taste
a bunch of people on Tictok are praising the prose, and saying that shes wrong but is a great writer.
Are they 13 years old or something? It's written worse than verbose reddit comments, and that's saying something
some of them were indeed adults, you cant tell from most accounts though.
Begging these people to read an actual book by a good author. Even books written for kids and teenagers are 100x better than this article.
You made it halfway congrats. I got like 6 sentences
https://www.graziechristie.com/
they've got a whole series of pointless, misogynistic articles, and are even the editor of a magazine (I presume the started it)
grazie, you're a piece of shit
Best comment:
This is a deeply silly essay. But I gotta comment on this statement. "I dream of new structures, a world in which women have entry-level jobs in their 30s; alternate avenues for promotion; corporate ladders with balconies on which they can stand still, have a smoke, take a break, make a baby, enjoy themselves, before they keep climbing."
Hahahaha. While you are dreaming of it in your leisurely marriage to wealthy not-old man, my female colleagues and I are making it happen. (You're welcome.) Tonight we'll meet up for happy hour, drinking wine we learned about on trips we happily planned and paid for ourselves, giggling over those girls we saw hanging around our business school library who imagined that the single men we went to school with were prizes worthy of trading our wonderful, formative, adventurous 20s for. Cheers.
P.S. Your husbands are trying to have affairs with us.
Women in their 30s don't know entry level position. All they know is stand still, have smoke, take break, make baby and lie.
this is hard to read and keep up with but she wanted to marry her dad is what i get out of this.
My husband isn’t my partner. He’s my mentor, my lover, and, only in certain contexts, my friend.
This part did it for me.
She 100% calls him "Daddy" at his request.
That seems almost too mainstream for someone this deep into it, she probably calls him stuff like "Papa" and "Father Dearest" too
"Why does every woman not simply go to Harvard and comb parties for a rich foreign exchange student?"
Right-wingers yearn to be the dog of someone stronger than them.
I support it as a kink but not as a societal structure y'know?
i look forward to the follow up in 10 years: he found someone younger to have a baby with and now i--a fiscally illiterate 35 year old with pride in having cultivated a millionaire's tastes--live with my parents like some shit out of a Jane Austen novel.
i get the bit about not wanting to "train" some guy her age about how to wipe his ass or pick up his towels, but its hilarious that her solution is to just be the totally-not-resentful caged bird who, and i quote:
There are only so many times one can say “thank you” — for splendid scenes, fine dinners — before the phrase starts to grate. I live in an apartment whose rent he pays and** that shapes the freedom with which I can ever be angry with him**.
je. sus. christ.
anyway, i've never been one to find much sustainable attraction in romance with someone who isn't a peer. i can't imagine the resentment of being near 40 and being treated like a aesthetically pleasing accessory rather than someone with whom i keep counsel about the important things that weigh on me. the psychosocial developmental distance between her and her "crazy" friends who have partners and careers and are all figuring out how to balance their compromises, careers, family, and personal integrity is going to be the grand canyon. she is 100% going to be the one they all roll their eyes about.
I mean the vast majority of women around the world date and then marry a man a couple of years older than them for many of the same reasons stated in the article. It's just that most people don't take it to the extreme of a 10 year age gap when you're 20, and getting married at 23, like the author of this terribly written article did. For the vast majority of people, it's usually a 2-3 year age gap with the husband being the older partner, and getting married in the mid 20s or early 30s.
So what is the point of this article? That taking patriarchal norms to their extremes is somehow good? If that were true, most women and men would be doing that, but evidently they are not. I legitimately do not understand why any woman would argue that exacerbating patriarchal relationship norms is a good thing.
i feel so fucking bad for straight women
if i were in their situation i think i'd consider it a blessing to die alone
I used to love men like men love women — that is, not very well
Okay that got a chuckle out of me
Papistry and its consequences
Pee pee poo poo 💩💩 :butt-trumpet:, an essay, by farthead
no more half measures walter
Ok now someone write “the case for marrying your father” with the same article just replacing father into the sentences instead of older man. Then send it to her.
great way to have limited freedom over your future, your person, your reproductive capacity, your travel, etc. etc. etc. for the rest of your sad life
The top comment on the article perfectly sums it up, I'd say...
