this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2024
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chapotraphouse

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I know we're riding high on this dude getting got and that we all wish this would happen more often.

all i'm saying is don't post anything you wouldn't want read out in a courtroom. fedposting are watching

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[–] AOCapitulator@hexbear.net 86 points 3 weeks ago

To any feds reading this:

Quit your job or do something awesome to make them fire you, or you're a loser sorry to say

[–] PM_ME_YOUR_FOUCAULTS@hexbear.net 82 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Everybody is a disciplined ML until the hot new propaganda of the deed drops

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 51 points 3 weeks ago

The erudite and sensible part of my brain is like "this could have some unforeseen consequences"

My primitive lizard hindbrain is going party-sicko

[–] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 70 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I for one am glad he's dead and hope he's the first of many. Read that out in a courtroom, and I challenge you to find a juror who hasn't had at least one family member fucked over by these ghouls and wouldn't feel the same. #JuryNullification. Now they can't read this post out loud, and if they try to redact that part I'll say it out loud for them.

[–] QuillcrestFalconer@hexbear.net 40 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Just write #juryNullification every other word to make sure

[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 9 points 3 weeks ago

That jury of peers

youre-awful obama-socialism angry-place no-i-in-pezza clown marx-joker joker-shopping joker-che i-do jokerfied matt-joker joker-laden

[–] SuperZutsuki@hexbear.net 64 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Please read this in a courtroom PIGPOOPBALLS

Death to all slaveowners, landlords, CEOs, billionaires, and their neoliberal pets

[–] Dirt_Owl@hexbear.net 64 points 3 weeks ago

Imagine being paid to make the world a worse place for everyone. Imagine that being your legacy.

I guess Feds have that in common with Insurance CEOs.

[–] kristina@hexbear.net 52 points 3 weeks ago

Its not adventurism if you don't get caught angel-biblical-shh

[–] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 50 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Hello federal agent peepeepooopoo cum

pathetic

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 47 points 3 weeks ago
[–] TheLepidopterists@hexbear.net 45 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Idk they're gonna have their hands full. The nursing subreddit is delighted that this guy got got

[–] SoyViking@hexbear.net 29 points 3 weeks ago

That makes perfect sense. It must be horrible to be a healthcare professional and be prevented from giving sick and desperate people the care they need, especially when you know it is to line the pockets of vampires like this guy.

[–] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 44 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

read this out in the courtroom: "google jury nullification"

[–] OprahsedCreature@lemmy.ml 22 points 3 weeks ago

Unfortunately that's why they use Grand juries all the time: They have a predetermined result and just need a minimal amount of assent.

[–] Erika3sis@hexbear.net 39 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah, it's obviously a terrible idea to post things like that on a public forum. You save those thoughts for your manif— [muffled sounds of struggling]

Sent from Mdewakanton Dakota lands / Sept. 29 1837Treaty with the Sioux of September 29th, 1837

"We Will Talk of Nothing Else": Dakota Interpretations of the Treaty of 1837

[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 37 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

Prosecutor: Bureaucrat, it looks like you were caught posting pictures of the same 'whatchamacallit' that was used to kill Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe in response to the death of Mr. Thompson. Do you find this funny?

Me: Actually, it's called a 'doohickey' the-doohickey and I'm tired of pretending it's not. i-do

[–] propter_hog@hexbear.net 14 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Do all bureaucrats/bureaucats have to show up and answer the questions simultaneously? Just thinking about the logistics of this.

[–] Bureaucrat@hexbear.net 15 points 3 weeks ago

A different bureaucrat gets to go to each court date and is provided notes on what the last one said 20 minutes prior, we draw straws for jury summons, and the least vulnerable goes to prison first.

[–] Rom@hexbear.net 37 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (2 children)

I mean yeah it's basic opsec, if you're going to do something spicy you keep your mouth shut and don't blab about it all over social media.

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 38 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah, I ain't doing shit, but I'm drunk and cheering from the nosebleed section! RIP BOZO!!!

[–] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 6 points 3 weeks ago

the one crime i don't celebrate is, by process of elimination, the one i did

[–] GalaxyBrain@hexbear.net 33 points 3 weeks ago
[–] Alaskaball@hexbear.net 32 points 3 weeks ago

rude thing to call the admins

[–] SaniFlush@hexbear.net 26 points 3 weeks ago

Maybe United Healthcare will let their insurance cards cover toothpaste now.

[–] Mardoniush@hexbear.net 25 points 3 weeks ago

Adventures are always more fun when you have a Party.

[–] sisatici@hexbear.net 24 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

nerd cope and seethe.

To any feds looking. I was the murderer.

[–] TankieTanuki@hexbear.net 17 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 9 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] Evilphd666@hexbear.net 11 points 3 weeks ago

sicko-hexbear-crowd are Sparticus

[–] QuillcrestFalconer@hexbear.net 6 points 3 weeks ago

No, I did it, how dare you take this away from me

[–] Collatz_problem@hexbear.net 24 points 3 weeks ago
[–] ReadFanon@hexbear.net 22 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

What did the bicyclist say to the UnitedHealthcare CEO?

punchlineYou're fired trump-kubrick-stare

I hope they make me read this in court. I want it to happen.

[–] Krono@lemmy.today 12 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Check out this unedited comment I made about 2 weeks ago:

UnitedHealth is pure evil. If anyone ever burns down UnitedHealth facilities or murders anyone in their executive leadership, just know that if I am on your jury you are going to be acquitted.

I wonder if my FBI agent is feeling like I'm nostradamus today as I cheer on the heroic shooter and subtly encourage copycats in a responsible and legal manner.

[–] propter_hog@hexbear.net 2 points 2 weeks ago

I'm giving up my turn with the lathe of heaven; @Krono@lemmy.today gets my turn

[–] ButtBidet@hexbear.net 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 3 points 3 weeks ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] Speaker@hexbear.net 5 points 3 weeks ago