fuck im old

Cis people really don't get it do they

they should rename greece to south macedonia and macedonia to north greece

that way no one's happy

Wow, it's been a while. Hi traa!

i don't want to have to spend my life just fighting to exist but I guess I just don't have that option

the horrors persist but so do i

I love trans people, I love people who take their self-expression into their own hands and do what makes them happy.

Being off testosterone is so bad for my mental state yet I can’t afford it. Shit fucking sucks and I hate my life

I'm actually really worried about the future here in the US, I've got no money/skills so I can't up and move but I really don't want to end up on an RFK ""wellness""farm or in an El Salvadorian prison. It's not looking to good out here for an autistic trans woman

Am I freaking myself out over nothing? Should I be this worried? What can I even do?

My boobs are finally affecting how my tops drape

holy fuck i'm two weeks sober now?

it's been years since I've been able to claim that

okay random as fuck but I saw a tweet which made me think about those MySpace bulletin surveys you used to do back in the day and, being the hoarder that I am, I actually found some that I had saved as text files

and holy shit, one of the first answers slapped me in the fucking face. I won't quote it verbatim on the off-chance that someone has a pre-wipe MySpace database, but it basically reads

LORD SOMEONE GO TELL THIS CHILD THAT TRANS PEOPLE EXIST

that aside, I honestly had no idea I that kind of explicit eggy sentiment that early on. Sure, it's very flippant, but like--that's a weird thing for a cis guy to say, right? Wish I'd kept a diary, but I guess MySpace surveys will have to do

Shaved both my face and body with zero cuts for the first time

me after dropping one (1) progesterone pill on the ground and losing it

Got a haircut today and omg I love it I love my new bangs I love the deliberate messiness I love the way it frames my face I love the volume that I didn't think my hair could even do I love how it's short but still distinctly femme I love how it looks with my overall fashion I love it I love it I love it, been several hours and I'm still glowing

Holy shit, so I just randomly ran into a friend from more than a decade ago and caught up a bit and it was really sweet and crazy unlikely and I was a whole ass different person when we were last friends and he was super sweet and positive about it and I have a lot of feelings about it and am kinda overwhelmed

down with the cis

Mirthlessly laughing because I realised tonight I can't change the gender markers on my birth certificate even though my state in Australia would let me because I was born in a foreign country I don't even have citizenship to, my parents were just working there.

Best I can do is like an update of details certificate.

i can get on the waiting list for bottom surgery soon. i could have a pussy in (in the grand scheme of things) not too distant future holy fuck i'm getting chills just thinking about it

EDIT: okay thanks for the "congrats" everyone but i think i should clarify that i haven't even done like, anything at all to prep for this or research anything, this is just me realizing "i could probably start making those phone calls at this point in my transition". didn't mean to state that like, anything really happened to me beyond hitting the 1 year HRT mark, almost

Folx, I think I'm starting to develop a woman's intuition. For the last few days I've been worried that my homebrew estriadol order got cancelled, or fell through the cracks, or I got scammed for some bazingacoins, since I paid for it about a week ago and still haven't gotten a shipment tracking link. I even sent a support ticket asking them what the h*ck is going on. But on the way home, for no reason at all I thought "maybe I'll check the mailbox before going in" (not something I typically do), and lo and behold, it had arrived

My phone autocomplete suggests “gurls” instead of “girls”

theres like a 5 minute window where the tea is not too hot and not too cold, and i always miss it

Sorry for wasting everybody's time writing this post. We try and keep it positive but we just don't really care anymore. :::

apologies to all the gay and bi guys i accidentally led on back in my EDM club days

i know things got crosswired because i was high and in femmebrain mode and twunky and probably seemed flirty and basically wasted your entire night

except for that CATO libertarian guy. i'm glad i wasted your night

life is hard/unfair

Yea and it sucks and I hate it and it makes me want to kms. Has for a while.

other people have it worse then you

Yea and that sucks for them, and I hate it, and it makes me want to die. I've felt fucking horrible about it forever but its not like I have any real power.

Why do people continue this circle of suffering. I do not understand. I would kill myself if I forced a child to suffer like this. Maybe other people are less bothered by suffering? :::

I've been thinking about RuPaul's Drag race recently and basically 2 points that might be connected or coincidence.

Firstly you never fucking hear Cishets talking about it anymore. Like a few years back it was a thing they would always bring up when someone was gay or trans (unfortunately). Despite it being on it's 17th season and having like 20 something international spin-offs. Like that's not necessarily a bad thing, except...

Secondly the show has done a real 180 on how shitty and transphobic it was. RuPaul still sucks for fracking and other reasons (but he's only on like 3 of the shows, and no one watches to see him phone it in each week), but he's basically recanted most of the transphobic shit he said. Each season has multiple trans women or non binary performers, even one trans man has competed. The top finalists of later seasons are frequently trans, several trans women/femmes have won the show (mainline and spin-offs).

The most recent show had enormous representation in Lexi Love who was/is a complete train wreck (but still a top 4 finalist). Drag Race Canada this most recent season had Jaylene Tyme a two-Spirit First Nations and Métis Indigenous trans woman, who was a sixties scoop survivor (Canadian stolen generation equivalent).

It's lib/idealist AF but this quote from Vulture is still pretty true.

But something else that is true is that there is no other program on TV, period, on which a convicted felon can come and be celebrated for his love of his gay, drag-queen son. I also can’t remember the last time I saw a transphobic mother work so hard to overcome her biases and reconnect with the daughter she threw out of the house. Even Sam Star’s mother, a deeply southern woman who has a fearsome dedication to her child, is a revolutionary figure right now. The world is terrible, corporations around the country are dropping queer people left and right, but Drag Race still exists. It’s nice.

And guess circling back around to my first point, the show got better about trans people, and then it sort of dropped off the public's radar.

That’s a weird looking fruit.

this is my second week taking injections instead of drops. much preferable. never going back.

I need more gender I need to feel affirmed and safe and feminine...

This seems to have flown under the radar

One of two FTL co-creators, Jay Ma, came out as trans somewhat recently

Shaved and moisturised my legs after like a month of not doing it

woke Frostpunk be like: "we've got to build the Genderator"

Update on coming out to my friend. I haven't seen much of her in a few years but still counts. She's proud of me, glad I told her, and I got to tell someone else my name. (which she loves for me and I am riding that wave, holy hell I forgot how much I like having my name complimented). She's actually got a trans member of her extended family, which I didn't know about. So yea, very nice to get to talk with her about it a bit.

I still (kind of, complicated obviously) come out to my main irl friend. Don't know when that will happen though.